Yuri Hero and Loli Demon King - Chapter 10-2

Rei’s room, with its incongruous pink and blue tones, doesn’t match her image at all; in my opinion, these colors suit Haitang better. If I had to describe a color fitting for Rei, it would probably be a reddish-brown!

Before going to bed, I lifted the mattress and checked under the bed, but found nothing.

“Come on, usually people hide embarrassing things near their bed, right? It makes it easier for certain activities.”

I searched the drawers, wardrobe… every obvious spot, yet there wasn’t a single inappropriate book in sight.

Could it be that Rei doesn’t read those kinds of books? That’s completely illogical, not how a typical adolescent girl should behave! Even an ordinary woman should have a couple of romance novels! How could Rei, a serious siscon, possibly be so pure that she doesn’t even own one sister-themed book?

Ah, forget it, I’m done searching!

Disappointed, I carelessly tossed the item in my hand, which unexpectedly hit the bookshelf, causing dozens of books to tumble onto the floor.

“How could they fall so easily—!?”

Despite venting my frustration, if I don’t clean this up quickly, I’ll surely get scolded.

So, reluctantly, I picked up a book titled “Sister’s Sky” and returned it to the shelf.

…

Wait a second, “Sister’s Sky”? Why does that title sound kind of… Hmm? No way, could it be?

I looked skeptically around at the scattered books on the floor. “Siscon Wants to Fall in Love!””Sister Soul,” “Sister Domain,” “Isn’t My Sister Cute,” “Kiss Sister,” “Two of Them Are Sisters,” “Sister Complex Sister’s Memo,” “Sister Lover,” “Yuri Sisters and Loli Sister”…

These are all siscon books! Rei brazenly places these kinds of books on her bookshelf! Such elite level of shamelessness, such a broad mind! I feel ashamed for my own sneaky behavior.

But no, these books on the floor aren’t what truly surprise me. What really shocks me are the books still perched proudly on the bookshelf, high above, looking down at me—those tomes occupying the top shelf!

The books on top only avoided falling because the shelf was packed to the brim. Suppressing my burning curiosity, I stood on my tiptoes and took one down.

“Sister Cruelty”…

Whoa! This title makes me so embarrassed! Even more than the previous books! What’s this? Is the author that cat?

I’ve made up my mind: my target is the top shelf books. Our enemy awaits at the temple of truth, and we must claim the heads of these indecent books!

Setting up a ladder (okay, it’s actually a chair), I began climbing the gate to truth.

Alright! I’ve got them. I’ll take them all down for a closer inspection!

“Illusion Sister House,” “Sister Humiliation, Revenge Academy,” “Super Flash Sister,” “Fallen Sister,” “Faceless Sister”…

Rei’s lack of propriety is clear as day now! These interests are so peculiar! Why is there so much humiliation-themed content? Unlike me, who only reads innocent works like “Kiss That Sister.””What a terrifying woman. I better put these away quickly before I end up as the protagonist in one of these humiliation stories…”

“Shall I help you tidy up?”

Just as I was wondering how many years it would take to clean up this mess, a kind-hearted person offered to help me organize.

I was so focused on arranging the books that I didn’t look up at the sweet-voiced Mage who had spoken, but with such a gentle and sweet voice, she must be a beauty!

“Ah, thank you! You’ve been a great help!” I responded with gratitude and suggested, “After we’re done here, why don’t we spend the night together?”

“Sure! And we can do some SM play too! By the way, I’m an S.” The Mage said in a sweet tone, startling me with her words, “I’ll leave it to you to play the role of M, then!”

Wait! What kind of shameless proposal is this? Who would suggest playing SM with someone they just met? How much of a psychological deviant is this person, for heaven’s sake!

“Uh, isn’t that, um… a bit too much? I think just a normal connection would be fine. I mean, could we keep it more ordinary?”

“Understood! Then we’ll combine wax with your OO!”

What on earth is this––! What is combining with wax supposed to mean? That’s not a connection; it’s wax dripping play! Why has such an utterly indecent line appeared? My morals are on the floor! I don’t even know where to start criticizing this!

Abandoning the task of organizing the books, I abruptly looked up to see the unashamed pervert’s true appearance––she had ankle-length brown hair, wore a Japanese-style Shrine Maiden outfit, and was wrapped in several rune-inscribed bands. As for her looks, she was cute and sweet but unsettling, as if she could cast a fireball spell on you at any moment.

“…Damn it, we’re doomed.” Seeing the United Nations army before me, I couldn’t help but sigh with emotion.”You might want to consider shooting yourself, you useless Hero.” She continued to smile as usual.

“Do you think I’m some kind of supreme leader?”

“What do you think?” Rei, as cunning as the Soviets, maintained her chilling smile: “Suicide or cremation, your choice!”

No, if this keeps going, she’ll kill me! Am I going to be cut off halfway through the series?

I need to turn this around… I know! Change the subject!

“So, um, the weather is really nice today!”

“Yes, it’s an excellent day for sunbathing a corpse!”

WTF, what kind of extreme response is that!?

Rei keeps steering the conversation towards “killing me”!

“Oh, the little sister type is really nice, good job!”

“Oh my, the macabre type is nice too, go to hell!”

…

It’s just a fetish being discovered! Why are they treating me like this, is it wrong for Ata?

That’s it! If I steer the conversation towards something she’s interested in, perhaps I can divert her attention!

“Spe-speaking of which, Haitang is also like a sister, right? What do you think of her, Rei?”

“Huh!?”

She immediately froze, her face gradually turning red.

This is the first time I’ve seen such a shy expression from the two-faced Shrine Maiden, does she have such a side?

“I…”

In a bashful yet determined tone, she declared: “I love Ophelia, even if we gathered the love of tens of millions of brothers, it wouldn’t match my love for her!”

“Are you Hamlet…”

(Note: Originally Hamlet, also known as ‘The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark’, a play by Shakespeare. The protagonist Hamlet’s lover is Ophelia, sister to Laertes.)

“No, I am Romeo.”

“That makes no sense at all!””Romeo’s lover isn’t Ophelia, it’s supposed to be Juliet!”

“But cousins are also in the ‘sister’ category!”

(Note: Originally from ‘Romeo and Juliet’, translated as ‘Romeo and Juliet’, another work by Shakespeare. The protagonist Romeo’s lover is Tybalt’s cousin—Juliet.)

There’s no hope for Rei, she’s hopeless, absolutely hopeless!

Come to think of it, both of those plays end in tragedy, right? Rei, do you want to die from love?

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After some back-and-forth, thankfully due to the siscon discussion, I escaped my predicament, pretending to go nearby to buy weapons.

Phew, I almost met an untimely end in the middle of this Chapter. Wait, doesn’t that idiom refer to a king’s death? Whatever, it’s all the same!

Though I said I was slipping away, in reality, Rei instructed me to buy weapons, saying, “So that you don’t look so shabby in battle again, useless Hero, please quickly go buy some gear and weapons, would you?” Even though she used polite language, Rei’s words were filled with orders and disdain.

Hmm… I have 2,000 yuan on hand.

For future battles, I went to the blacksmith’s shop, where all sorts of weapons were sold.

“It’s been a long time since you came!”

The blacksmith owner shouted loudly, looking like a typical bearded guy with a beer belly, just like one would expect in most RPGs.

Why are you saying that line? You’re disguised as the blacksmith owner from Dragon *Valley* right?

“Here we recommend ‘3,000 Lives Sword’, now on sale for 3,000 yuan!”

“No, thanks.”

“Then how about the ‘Golden Pledge *Sword of O’Reilly*’, now on sale for 68,750,000,000 yuan!”

“How is that a sale?”

“You’re quite the cheapskate, then let me recommend the ‘Iron Lunchbox’, which can be used for begging, on sale for ten yuan.”

“You go beg yourself!”

“Or maybe the ‘Elder’, decent attack power, can even split in half for double the attack, on sale for one silver egg.”

“Never mind the joke weapon, but what’s with the joke price too?”

“The hair on the egg is curly.”

“Who cares about that! Speaking of which, aren’t you referring to Sakata *Gintoki’s* naturally curly hair?””Why does it sound like you’re talking about something indecent!”

“Why are you so picky, customer? Fine, fine, take this beginner’s sword and get lost! Don’t get in the way of my business!”

The shop owner, clearly irritated, tossed a beginner’s sword at me and waved me away impatiently.

The service here is really terrible!

In the end, I’m stuck with a beginner’s sword…

Disappointed with the blacksmith’s shop, I moved on to the next store.

“Come, come! Everything in the store is slashed to 199! Only 199 for anything you can see!”

The shopkeeper, who was shouting this, rushed over to me as soon as I entered, “Miss, miss, these are our handmade bags…”

“Aren’t you selling clothes?”

“Yes, yes, then let me recommend our bestseller — ‘Naked Apron’!”

“That can’t possibly offer any defense!” I couldn’t help but use my sarcasm skill, “Why is something like this a bestseller!?”

“It’s a must-have for housewives! Besides, it doesn’t really offer defense; it increases evasion and productivity.”

“I’m not a housewife! And why is it a must-have for housewives? You’ve been watching too much questionable content!” I retorted, “And what’s this about productivity? You just mean getting knocked up, right!?”

“Then how about the ‘Pure White Sailor Uniform’? When wet, it has a destructive power!”

“It’ll only destroy a pervert’s sanity!”

The shopkeeper sighed and picked up a trash can, “Then I’ll just sell you these pants.”

“Those aren’t pants, they’re junk (くず, KuZu, similar pronunciation to ‘pants’)!”

“Why are you so picky, customer? Fine, fine, take this beginner’s sword and get lost! Don’t get in the way of my business!”

The shop owner, clearly irritated, tossed a beginner’s sword at me and waved me away impatiently.

The service here is really terrible!

Wait a minute!Why is a clothing store giving me a beginner’s sword…?

Disappointed by the blacksmith and clothing stores, I moved on to the next shop.

“Isn’t that Sanlü Doctor?”

“Why does everyone think I’m a fisherman!” I replied with sarcasm, “I’m a Hero, not Sanlü Doctor!”

“A swimmer? Then how about taking a swim in the Miluo River?”

“Are you trying to kill me?”

Ignoring my protest, the jewelry store owner turned around and took out a penguin. “This is ‘Aito Riding Goose,’ also known as the ‘Goose that Wants to Become an Oiran Bird.'”

“Stop making fun of people’s nicknames!” (Note: Riding Goose is a well-known user on a Taiwanese forum for parody novels.)

“Come on, not interested in Riding Goose?” The owner shoved the penguin towards me, “With this, you’ll play Mahjong better!”

“I want to fight monsters, not play Mahjong!”

“Self-draw! Rinshan Kaihou, All Simples, Triplets, Triple Concealed Pungs, Three Kongs, 70 points, 8 Han, 8000 All!”

“I told you I don’t want to play Mahjong! And isn’t Aito’s owner supposed to be Rinshan Player?”

“Why are you so picky, customer? Fine, fine, take this beginner’s sword and get out! Don’t interrupt my business!”

The owner, clearly impatient, casually tossed another beginner’s sword at me and signaled me to leave.

That was quick—they lost patience so fast!

Wait a minute! Why is even the jewelry store giving me a beginner’s sword!?

Since I have three beginner swords, I might as well name them “Wari Ichimonji,” “Sandai Kotetsu,” and “Shuusui.”

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Meanwhile, at the “Fairy Buttocks” guild, in Haitang’s dorm room.

Rei gently stroked Haitang’s sleeping face, much like a mother watching over her child.

“Sister-type… is it?”

That useless Hero might be mistaken. I don’t like Haitang because she’s like a sister.

In fact, it’s the opposite—

“Because of Haitang, I started liking the sister type.”

But if someone were to ask me, “Is your feeling for Haitang love?” I wouldn’t be able to give an answer.”I might be a despicable woman, Haitang, perhaps I just…”

–– see you as a substitute for her.

If she… If Xiao Mo were still alive, she’d probably be around Haitang’s age, right?

Ah, I don’t have the resolve of Romeo, and I’m even more indecisive than Hamlet. How should someone like me bring happiness to Juliet? How should I bring happiness to Ophelia?

“How should I… bring happiness to Haitang?”

I don’t want to equate Haitang with Xiao Mo, yet I can’t help but think of them together.

I must stop this line of thought! Frailty, thy name is woman!