[To Become a River of Stars] Dong Xiange - Chapter 34
His footsteps were exceptionally light. When he pushed the door open, moonlight filtered through the thin window paper, illuminating the tear stains on Shiliu’s face with a glistening sheen.
Caught red-handed, she had no chance to hide it. Fortunately, she remained relatively composed and did not reveal too much panic.
Li Xuanci paused for a moment, then kicked the door wide open. In a few strides, he was at her bedside, seizing her wrist. His eyes burned intensely, as if still carrying the lingering heat from the dream.
Shiliu instinctively trembled. The temperature of his palm was unusually high, scorching her heart as if stung by a venomous bee. A dull instinct warned her; his heavy gaze pressed down on her, and with the slightest provocation, it would overflow like a bursting flood, impossible to contain.
That momentary wavering was precisely captured by Li Xuanci. He tightened his grip on her wrist, leaving red marks on her fair, delicate skin, and asked coldly, “Was it you?”
Shiliu instinctively wanted to say “no,” but immediately realized it was a trap. A hint of confusion surfaced on her face—just enough—as she asked blankly, “What was me?”
She wanted to say more in her defense, but Li Xuanci’s fingers had already touched the tear stains on her face.
His fingers were calloused, hardened from years of wielding swords and spears. Shiliu’s tear-dampened skin was cool, while his fingers carried a scorching heat. The contrast was stark as they made contact.
His fingertips slowly and deliberately traced the damp trails of her tears, but there was no tenderness in the gesture. Instead, it felt like an eagle circling overhead, waiting for its prey to let down its guard.
“Crying like this, and you still want to deny it?”
Li Xuanci curled one side of his lips. Though it resembled a smile, it held no warmth, instead it carried a heavy, murderous intent.
Shiliu sensed it keenly.
Just like last time—when he suspected her of meddling, knowing she might have also dreamed and could glimpse the nature of his dreams—he had been moved to kill. Now, if he confirmed she was the one in the dream, he would likely be even more furious and humiliated.
She quickly abandoned her plan to deny everything and changed her approach, admitting frankly, “I dreamed of being intimate with a woman, but she was very dominant. She tied me up and tormented me, so… so I felt very wronged.”
Li Xuanci’s eyes darkened further. He asked in a low voice, “So, not only did you invade my dream, but you also mistook me for a woman?”
With each word, his hand slid down an inch, coming to rest dangerously on her vulnerable neck. His hand could easily encircle it, his fingertips brushing over her pulsing veins. A slight squeeze would be enough to cut off her life.
She quickly formulated a response in her mind, selectively sharing the thoughts she had been mulling over for days. Though she had no solid evidence or certainty, there was no time to worry about that now.
“These strange dreams are probably because of that strange bird. I think I know what that monster is,” she said, suppressing the tremor in her voice and speaking as calmly as possible.
The faintly heated fingers on her neck loosened slightly. His expression remained unreadable as he waited for her to continue.
“Among the Twelve Heavenly Generals, there is a beast named Boqi. Originally human, he was killed after his father believed his stepmother’s slander. After death, he transformed into a bird that can know and devour dreams.”
“In Taoism, dreams are often said to be caused by soul demons or the Three Corpses. If this bird monster is Boqi, it’s not impossible for it to use dreams to turn us against each other.”
Shiliu spoke rapidly, shifting all the blame onto the bird. In truth, she wasn’t sure, but after recalling all the ancient texts she had read, this was the only explanation that fit. To save her life, she poured it all out.
“If that bird had such abilities, would it need to rely on its companion faking its death to escape?” Li Xuanci clearly wasn’t fully convinced, his words sharp.
“Being skilled at entering dreams doesn’t necessarily mean being strong in a fight. Different specialties,” Shiliu replied, growing increasingly unsure as she spoke.
She coughed lightly and added earnestly, “During the Tang Dynasty, when Liu You was returning home, he passed a wilderness temple and saw his wife entangled with another man. He threw a stone at them, and in an instant, the lights went out, and the people vanished. He was utterly baffled. When he returned home, his wife voluntarily told him she had just dreamed of wandering in a temple with someone when suddenly a stone was thrown at her, and she woke up.”
“This shows that dreams and reality are often hard to distinguish. That bird holds a grudge, and we’re bound by the Fate-Link. Perhaps that’s why it transformed us into women in each other’s dreams—to humiliate us. If we turn against each other because of its tricks, wouldn’t that only please our enemies and pain our allies?”
Her words, in essence, were just a plea not to kill her.
Li Xuanci studied her deeply, his expression unreadable. Finally, with a chilling smile, he mocked, “You consider yourself an ally now?”
Shiliu knew he was looking down on her again, but circumstances forced her hand. She could only grit her teeth and let him vent.
“You decide. If you don’t think so, then we’re not.”
Hmph, who wants to be your ally anyway? Shiliu thought indignantly.
She barely managed to get through this hurdle, but Li Xuanci still hadn’t let his guard down. His fingers twitched slightly, his index finger resting on her Adam’s apple, the thin callus brushing lightly against it.
Then he looked up and suddenly asked, “Are you a woman?”
A roaring sound filled Shiliu’s ears. Blood rushed wildly to her temples with each heartbeat. She forced herself to suppress her emotions; otherwise, her physical reactions would betray her before she even spoke.
She couldn’t give herself away. If this imperial threat discovered her secret and used it to blackmail the Zhenyi Sect and her master, she would be a sinner.
Shiliu thought quickly. Since leaving home, she had worn a chest binder even at night, so there was no visible giveaway. Her master had given her pills long ago, making her voice indistinguishable from that of a boy whose voice hadn’t fully deepened. The scar from the artificial Adam’s apple was clearly visible. His question was likely just suspicion sparked by the dream, not based on evidence.
She calmed herself slightly. Feigning anger now would be overkill. Instead, she said blankly, “People have said since I was young that I look neither male nor female. It’s why my family abandoned me. Only my master didn’t despise me.”
She looked up into his eyes. “Now even Your Highness says this… I suppose I really am strange-looking.”
A dazed, lonely look appeared in her eyes, enough to soften anyone’s heart.
Li Xuanci felt a strange sensation. His rationality hadn’t eased his suspicions in the slightest, yet he couldn’t shake the feeling that he didn’t like the person beneath him looking like this.
It was nothing like their usual carefree, eat-and-sleep-without-a-worry demeanor.
Seeing his silence, Shiliu added fuel to the fire, boldly taking his hand and guiding it downward toward her crotch.
“If Your Highness doesn’t believe me, you can feel my pee-pee yourself. It’s not small either—quite sizable, actually.”
Shiliu was betting that Li Xuanci would never be willing to touch another male’s private parts. She had begun to understand his ways; he was fastidious about such matters. Making him touch another man’s pen*s would be nothing short of a profound humiliation.
The bolder she acted, the less likely Li Xuanci would be to actually check.
Sure enough, Li Xuanci frowned and swiftly withdrew his hand, the disgust on his face unmistakable.
He simply got off the bed. Just as he was about to leave, he paused. “If I find out you’ve deceived me, there are thousands of ways to make you regret it.”
He glanced back at her and said coldly, “Watch yourself.”
Then he left without looking back, kicking the door so hard it swung back and forth, forcing Shiliu to get up once more to lock it.
(Author’s Note:
The Boqi mentioned in this chapter originates from Sima Biao’s Continued Han Records: Rituals and Customs. In Nuo culture, there are twelve divine beasts. By the end of the Han Dynasty, rituals involving “Songs of the Twelve Beasts Devouring Ghosts” appeared. The twelve divine beasts—Jia Zuo, Shi Wei, Xiong Bo, Teng Jian, Lan Zhu, Boqi, Qiang Liang, Zu Ming, Wei Sui, Cuo Duan, Qiong Qi, and Teng Gen—were said to devour eleven types of ghostly plagues, including ghost tigers, epidemics, demons, misfortunes, calamities, dreams, violent deaths, parasites, visions, giants, and gu poison.
The origins of the twelve divine beasts are mostly obscure. Many of them are listed among the Four Fiends in other legends but were transformed into evil-dispelling figures in Nuo culture.
The story of Liu You is recorded in Miscellaneous Morsels from Youyang.)