Chapter 20:- Ashamed to Death

As dusk approached and the hour neared you time (5:00–7:00 p.m.), the first round of the horse race had already begun. Hooves thundered, proud young men cracked their whips and galloped full speed ahead, while the gathered ladies covered their smiles and called out their cheers. The scene was lively and spirited beyond compare.

The eldest son of the Left Prime Minister’s family, Shen Zhui, was in charge of all the preparations for this year’s horse fair. He had always handled matters with thoroughness and care.

Knowing that the young ladies might feel shy and restrained at first, he deliberately arranged for the men’s race to be run first; to warm up the crowd and ease the atmosphere.

To keep things fair, Shen Zhui had even designed a lottery system. Every contestant, regardless of rank or status, had to draw a bamboo lot beforehand. The number carved upon it determined their group; anyone with the same number would automatically be paired together.

This was meant to prevent experienced riders from deliberately seeking out novices to gain an easy win.

Princess Chaoyang ordered her maid to fetch her lot. Seeing the character “Thirteen” carved upon the bamboo slip, she hurriedly lowered her voice and asked, “Which number did Jiang Rao draw?”

The maid respectfully replied, “The young lady of the Marquis Household hasn’t drawn hers yet.”

“How odd. I haven’t seen her at all since the fire-lighting ceremony. Where has she run off to now?”

As she spoke, the princess craned her neck, glancing about in all directions. When she failed to spot the person she sought, she drew her gaze back.

The maid beside her sighed inwardly. The princess was always like this; no matter the occasion, she would pay obsessive attention to the movements of the Marquis’s third young lady, afraid that Jiang Rao might somehow steal away her spotlight.

Over the years, this fixation had never faded. In truth, it all traced back to a shadow cast on the princess’s tenth birthday.

That year, the Emperor of Donghua had sent his court’s most skilled royal embroiderer known as “Golden Needle Qiao” to the Jin kingdom, leaving behind several exquisite embroidered garments.

The Imperial Consort naturally secured a set for her daughter, the princess. But since the princess was still a child at the time, the cloth required for her attire hadn’t used up the full bolt of fabric.
The remaining piece was reported to the Empress, who, wishing to make a gracious gesture, decided on her own to use it to have a new dress made for Jiang Rao.

As the two girls were of similar age and stature, the dresses ended up looking almost identical.

By coincidence, on the day of the princess’s tenth birthday banquet, she wore her new gown, an outfit stunning enough to dazzle an entire hall.
Yet, to her dismay, when she entered, everyone had already been astonished once before, by Jiang Rao, who had appeared earlier in a dress nearly indistinguishable from her own.

The princess’s face had darkened on the spot.

Though they were about the same size, Jiang Rao’s skin was far fairer, and while each was pretty on her own, comparison made the difference painfully obvious. Against Jiang Rao’s radiance, Princess Chaoyang looked dull and ordinary.

The young princes and noble sons invited that day could hardly tear their eyes from Jiang Rao, their gazes glued to her figure.

Feeling that her limelight had been stolen and her dignity trampled, the princess, in a fit of childish anger, had shoved Jiang Rao straight into the lake. Fortunately, a palace maid skilled in swimming had rescued her quickly, and Jiang Rao escaped without serious harm.

Still, the incident soon reached the emperor’s ears.

At that time, Jiang Rao’s father was away on the northern frontier, fighting the Beiman tribes for the empire’s sake, while the princess, his own daughter, was bullying a loyal general’s child over a petty birthday jealousy.

The emperor’s fury was swift.

To preserve the court’s image, he punished the princess with three months of confinement.
It was only after the Imperial Consort personally pleaded for mercy and even went in person to the Marquis’s estate to visit Jiang Rao that the matter was finally put to rest.

Later, when Jiang Rao recovered, she never spoke of it again, never once blaming the princess who had nearly drowned her. But Princess Chaoyang, ever since, had nursed a deep-rooted grudge, targeting her in every way she could.

Now, her gaze fixed on a spot below the viewing stand. Her face darkened again.

“That woman laughing and fluttering down there, who is she?” the princess asked sharply. “She looks positively fox-like, leaning so shamelessly toward Brother Shen Zhui.”

The maid followed her gaze and indeed saw a young lady dressed in violet, laughing coquettishly.
Her body swayed with every laugh, her manner a deliberate display of flirtation, utterly lacking the restraint of a proper noblewoman.

Most attendees had come in simple riding attire, yet this lady wore an elaborate gown heavy with adornment.

Her gold hairpins and dangling ornaments swayed each time her shoulders moved; flashy and ostentatious. She looked far more ready for a beauty contest than for a horse race.

The maid quickly recognized her.

“Your Highness, that seems to be the eldest daughter of the Marquis of Jing’an’s third branch, her given name is Jiang Meier.”

“Another one from the Jiang family?!” The princess’s brows knitted tighter. “All the sisters from that household are the same disgraceful sort!”

At that, she pulled her eyes back with open disgust, and then looked again at the bamboo slip in her hand. Her voice lowered with bitter determination.

“Never mind her. Whatever happens this time, I must be grouped with Jiang Rao. I heard she’s only just started learning to ride so her skills must be dreadful. Just wait and see how I make her lose face before everyone!”

“…Yes, Your Highness.”

The maid could only bow and agree.

—–

Jiang Ming, seeing that Jiang Rao still hadn’t arrived, had no choice but to draw a lot on her behalf from the officiant in charge.

The bamboo slip bore the number three.

That was quite an early group; they should already be making their preparations by now.

Jiang Ming held the bamboo slip tightly, scanning the crowd for his sister, worry rising steadily in his chest when he failed to spot her.

The Crown Prince stood nearby, and noticing Jiang Ming’s anxious expression, he immediately stepped forward and asked, “Brother Jiang, who are you looking for?”

The form of address…calling him brother…ignored the proper distinctions of rank. Startled, Jiang Ming quickly corrected, “Your Highness is exalted, how could this humble subject be addressed as brother?”

But the Crown Prince Mu Ling dismissed the concern easily, his manner warm and personable.

“Once Rao’er marries into the Eastern Palace, we shall all be family. Why make such distinctions? Rao’er’s elder brother will naturally be my elder brother as well.”

Jiang Ming still felt the exchange somewhat improper. But since the Crown Prince had lowered himself to such intimacy, refusing again would only risk offending him.

At last, he could only bow and answer respectfully, “Your Highness is gracious.”

The Crown Prince went on, “The General sent someone to teach Rao’er to ride, did he not?
Why has she not returned after so long?”

Jiang Ming froze for a moment. When had he sent anyone?

Thinking back, he suddenly recalled, before going to find Ruyan, he’d wanted to assign someone to accompany his sister. By coincidence, he had run into Prince Chen, who had been idle at the time and had taken up the offer himself.

He hadn’t thought much of it then. But now that the Crown Prince was asking, realization hit him, it might not have been a wise decision.

After all, the relationship between the Crown Prince and Prince Chen was a sensitive one. If His Highness were to learn that Rao’er had been in close contact with Prince Chen, who knew what kind of suspicion might take root in his heart?

Thus, Jiang Ming could only give a vague reply, “Perhaps Rao’er has become too engrossed in her lessons and lost track of time. The girl has lately taken quite a liking to riding, I’m not sure what’s gotten into her.”

The Crown Prince nodded, unsuspecting.

“Even so, she should mind her health. Rao’er has been pampered since childhood; how could she possibly endure the jostling of horseback? Even if she enjoys it, there must be moderation.”

“Your Highness speaks truly,” Jiang Ming replied.

If Jiang Rao had heard them discussing her so earnestly just then, she would have cried injustice on the spot. Who exactly was the one being “immoderate” here?

Half an hour had passed and the one who had said she wanted to practice riding had yet to even touch a horse’s back.

There had been no jolting from a saddle yet her legs were already weak, unable even to stand properly.

Her lips were swollen and red, her breath stolen again and again until she was forced to whimper for air before he would finally let her go.

Between gasps, her face flushed scarlet, Jiang Rao glared at him, lips trembling.

“You… you’re a liar!”

The words were meant to be fierce but her voice was too soft, too wet, to hold any real threat.

Those eyes of hers, damp and glimmering….Was that supposed to be anger or seduction? Chen Lian couldn’t tell.

So he simply leaned in again and bullied her until he’d had his fill.

As for why she called him a liar… It was probably because, at the start, Chen Lian himself had been nervous so his first kisses were shallow and hesitant, no more than the lightest pecks.

But that kind of tentative touch only tormented Jiang Rao. The teasing, the almost-but-not-quite of it…it tickled unbearably, made her breath hitch, her body tremble, until she couldn’t help but let soft, unsteady sounds escape her throat.

And because of those few breathy little sounds, she paid dearly for it.

Chen Lian, untrained yet perceptive, had soon learned far too quickly, turning from novice to natural
until Jiang Rao’s knees nearly gave out, her expression hazy and flushed, eyes wet with heat.

He seemed intent on utterly devouring her.

By the time she was truly spent, her face was crimson, her whole body boneless against him. Her eyes shimmered with mist, and she looked so pitifully undone that Chen Lian finally forced himself to stop, suppressing the storm that roiled beneath his calm.

He murmured against her hair, gentle now, “Forgive me. I overstepped.”

He said it with such grave sincerity that it only made her blush harder. His righteous apology sounded, to her ears, even more indecent.

When she gave no reply, he asked again, utterly unbothered, his tone soft but teasing, “Does it hurt?”

Stop asking! she wanted to scream. Her ears burned hotter and hotter; she refused to answer.

But Chen Lian refused to let her retreat. Resting his chin shamelessly against her shoulder, he murmured low, his voice rough with amusement, “Rao’er, you really do… gasp beautifully.”

Those words….

“Chen Lian…!”

Her voice trembled, half from fury, half from mortification. She balled her fists and pounded at his back twice, but her blows were so soft that they might as well have been tickles.

The only result was her own sore hand. Pouting, she pulled back, deciding she wouldn’t touch him again.

“Mn…”

He finally gave a sound in reply. The note was low, hoarse, his voice like fire scraped against stone, every breath hot enough to burn.

“Chen Lian… you’re utterly wicked!” Jiang Rao whispered furiously, her tone shrinking smaller and smaller.

Even just speaking to him now made her feel flustered and strange; her mouth still tingled, tainted by his touch.

Chen Lian gave a soft laugh, a sound of quiet, confident guilt.

But then his gaze deepened, and he asked, voice deceptively mild, “Has the Crown Prince… ever lost control with you, the way I just did?”

“What?”

Jiang Rao blinked, startled. He’s jealous? He actually cares?

“Has he ever kissed you?”

Chen Lian’s tone was calm, unshaken, as if ready to accept whatever answer came.

Jiang Rao shook her head, answering in a small voice, “I wouldn’t let him touch me.”

His jaw tightened.

“You’re betrothed to him.”

She shot back at once, “But I’m not married to him! I won’t allow anything improper before that.”

And then she froze, realizing what she’d just said.

Improper? Yet hadn’t she just… allowed this?

Her cheeks flamed anew; the evidence of her “impropriety” still burned bright upon her lips.

“And what about me?” Chen Lian pressed, eyes dark with something unspoken. “I have no name, no title. So… was it only because I forced you?”

Jiang Rao bit her lip, eyes flashing. “Can’t you tell for yourself?”

The air between them went taut.

But before either could speak again, a sudden figure leapt over the fence with a swift flutter of silk.

In the blink of an eye, Ge Ruyan had landed not far from them. When she caught sight of the two locked in an embrace, lips reddened, faces far too close, her eyes widened, and she froze mid-step.

Ah, she thought with dismay, clearly not the right time to show up. Yet, she couldn’t quite make herself look away.

“Who’s there?”

Chen Lian reacted instantly, stepping forward to shield Jiang Rao behind him. His gaze sharpened, cold and dangerous like a predator ready to silence any witness to his secret.

Seeing the killing intent in his eyes, Jiang Rao quickly tugged at his sleeve, nervous and flustered.
Still hiding behind him, she stammered out, “Chen Lian, she’s with my household. She’s one of ours!”

Her voice was small, her embarrassment overflowing.

Without daring to show her face, she added quickly, “Ruyan, you mustn’t tell anyone what you saw today. Not even my brother!”

Ruyan let out a long “ohhh,” thought for a moment, then said bluntly, “You two really went a bit far, didn’t you? Rao’er, your lips look like you’ve been chewed on! Even if I keep quiet, anyone with eyes can see what’s happened.”

Ge Ruyan had always been outspoken, her words carrying that unmistakable jianghu straightforwardness.

Chewed on.

Jiang Rao wanted to die.

She wished the ground would open up and swallow her whole.