Reincarnated as a Poor Little Green Tea, Am I Destined to Be Bullied? - Volume 1 Chapter 70

Chapter 70: I’ll Go Send Him Off

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Perhaps what Auntie said wasn’t wrong.

Even today, Luo Yahan still feels guilty about her surname, a feeling that rationality cannot control.

In her dreams, Luo Yahan often sees a scene that intrudes into her dreams every few days.

Xia Mujin, covered in blood, turns back with empty, desperate eyes, and says in an icy tone, word by word:

“You Luo… give me back my brother… you murderers…”

And every time she wakes up startled in the middle of the night, Luo Yahan bites her lower lip, unable to fall back asleep for a long time.

Of course, these are just dreams.

In daily life, when Xia Mujin faces her, there’s always a bitter smile on her face, never mentioning what happened that year.

But as the ancient saying goes, love extends to the crow, and misfortune befalls the fish in the pond.

In the eyes of a girl who wholly depended on her brother, lost her closest family, and nearly had a mental breakdown, could she really distinguish the target of her hatred so clearly?

In other words, if your most precious doll falls into a pond, can you really just blame yourself for not holding it firmly, without blaming the pond for being there, and incidentally resenting all the fish swimming past in the pond?

When people are breaking down, they tend to transfer pressure onto many things, even if they might have nothing to do with that pressure.

Su Shuolan was crying. Luo Yahan, who was being comforted just moments ago, had now become the one doing the comforting.

“Auntie is right… maybe… I’m overthinking all these things. Xia Mujin is far more excellent than I imagined. All these years… she hasn’t complained about me once, and has never lost her temper with me. It’s just me thinking too much.”

No complaints.

But…

She has also never truly relied on me.

All these years, she has never called me “Sister Yahan” again — a name I used to hear often when she was little.

Luo Yahan convinced herself that she just grew up and didn’t want to use such childish terms anymore.

But what was the truth?

Luo Yahan knew in her heart.

Su Shuolan sat on the stairs covering her face, crying miserably. Even though Xia Qinyang had argued with her a lot over these years, that familial care hadn’t diminished. He wasn’t one to speak sweet words of comfort, so he could only step forward behind Su Shuolan and pat her shoulder, signaling her to stop crying.

At the same time, he continued to earnestly advise Luo Yahan.

“Your father and I are old classmates, and sometimes when we talk, even he feels guilty about it. A grown man would shed tears, let alone you, a young girl… But Yahan, you must constantly tell yourself that this has nothing to do with you all. And… Muqing is already gone, and Mujin is already like this. Of course we hope she gets better, but if she can’t recover, we shouldn’t keep dragging you all down with us, right?”

“Uncle, I understand everything, I won’t have any psychological pressure.”

“Good that you understand… Ah, these years, after Muqing left, everyone has been carrying too much burden.”

Luo Yahan nodded but didn’t say anything else.

Perhaps she could really buy a plane ticket, fly far away to start a new life and completely cut ties with this place.

But for Luo Yahan, that might be an even more painful thing.

She’s willing to be a maid here now, not just to take care of Xia Mujin, this is her own decision.

She must complete some unfinished wishes here.

Otherwise, carrying the cold wind of her hometown, she won’t get far.

“Uncle, Auntie, what were you discussing just now? It sounds… like it’s about ‘him’?”

Deliberately using the word “discussing” rather than arguing was also to ease the atmosphere and prevent making things worse.

Su Shuolan didn’t cry for too long either, she also needed a different topic to walk out of her sadness.

Taking the tissue Luo Yahan handed her, Su Shuolan wiped her tears while telling Luo Yahan about the current situation.

Facing this girl who had been coming to their house to play since childhood, Su Shuolan had no barriers in communication with her.

“Ah… yes… Yahan, you came at the right time… please help us consider, the day after tomorrow is Muqing’s burial, should we let Mujin go or not.”

“What’s your opinion?”

“I… ah, I don’t want her to go… that child doesn’t want to think about sad things, if we let her go, it will inevitably cause her more heartache.”

“Then let her stay at home, just don’t tell her about it.”

“That’s not a long-term solution.” Xia Qinyang flicked his shirt sleeve, feeling a heavy weight in his heart whenever he thought about these troublesome matters of recent years. “Can we trust what those psychologists say? I just don’t think it’s reliable. They’re not raising their own children after all, saying things like ‘as long as she doesn’t remember, everything will be fine,’ but what if it suddenly explodes one day? When Muqing’s body was brought back, she didn’t go to the hospital; when he was cremated, she didn’t go to the crematorium; now he’s about to be buried, and she’s not going to the cemetery either. If she remembers all these things in the future and realizes she never said goodbye to her brother, with her personality, can she handle it?!”

“Then you make the decision! If you think it’s fine then go tell her, and when she has an emotional breakdown at the cemetery, can you handle that?!”

“How do you know she can’t handle it?! She’s grown up now, she’s not that little girl anymore. Hiding, can we hide forever?! When others say she’s cold-blooded, say she didn’t even attend her own brother’s funeral, if these words reach her ears, how do you think she’ll feel?!”

Ah… they’re arguing again.

Luo Yahan stood up and walked between them, gesturing with her palms for them to stay calm.

“Uncle, Auntie, arguing won’t solve the problem.”

“I’m not trying to argue with your aunt.” Xia Qinyang sighed heavily and shook his head repeatedly. “Our Xia family isn’t afraid of anything, we’ve seen all kinds of storms, but when it comes to Mujin’s matter, I really have no idea what to do. Nothing seems right, it’s so worrying!”

“I understand… I understand both of your concerns, but let’s analyze this calmly first. This matter can’t be rushed.”

“Ah!”

After separating them to different sides of the stairs, Luo Yahan finally had some time to think about the pros and cons of this situation.

They both had valid points.

If she goes, she might break down.

If she doesn’t go, it plants hidden dangers for the future.

It’s a dilemma, but in Luo Yahan’s world, everything is like mathematical formulas on a blackboard, there’s always an optimal solution.

“I think… let me try to probe first. I’ll indirectly try to gauge her own thoughts. If she shows strong resistance, then we won’t mention it again, but if she also has that intention, we should follow her wishes.”

After all, Xia Mujin only selectively blocks her memories, she’s not suffering from amnesia.

She often thinks about Xia Muqing, and whenever she does, she breaks down crying. This heartache, compared to when she was young, is getting worse, not smoothed over by time, so Uncle’s worries are very reasonable. If she just accumulates these sorrows in her heart without any outlet for release, then what awaits her might be an emotional collapse someday in the future.

This is like the question Lin Yueye asked me before on the bus.

—— I have a friend who always guides me to cry, is this a bad friend?

No… appropriate release is not a bad thing.

Xia Qinyang and Su Shuolan both showed apologetic expressions upon hearing this.

They were all saying Luo Yahan could leave this place behind, fly far away.

But in reality, when these situations actually arise… every time only she can probe Mujin’s thoughts, others can’t even get close.

“Really… thank you for your trouble, Yahan, this matter is truly difficult…”

“I’ll go send him off.”

“Eh…?”

Xia Qinyang’s words of thanks were cut off halfway by this sudden voice that appeared unexpectedly.

She might mishear any sound in the world, but there was one voice she would never mistake.

Her own daughter’s voice, which echoed in her mind day and night, how could she hear it wrong.

Mujin?!

The gazes of the three people on the stairs turned simultaneously toward the first-floor platform below.

There stood Xia Mujin, wearing slippers, a coat over her pajamas, expressionless, who had appeared there at some unknown time.

She parted her cherry lips, and surprisingly, repeated softly once more.

“The day after tomorrow, I’ll go send him off.”