Push Me Away When I Come, Don't Hold Me Back When I Leave - Chapter 42

Chapter 42: Senior, I Won’t Give Up

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“Even though six years have passed, my feelings haven’t changed at all. I still like you so much, senior…”

“Senior… I like you… have always liked you so much… even if I can only be a supporting character, even if I’m just second best, I don’t mind…”

“Even if I’m not accepted, even if senior comes to hate me, I can’t hide it anymore…”

Luo Qingxuan’s voice grew softer and softer, almost inaudible.

Childhood love, two hearts contemplating, yet hard to forget.

Everyone held their breath. Those who had been whispering stopped their conversations. Even Xiao Qinghan and Chu Suhe wanted to know Xia Ruoming’s answer.

Xu Fengwu sat in her seat. She, who had been a bit proud just moments ago, was now completely stunned. Where did another childhood friend come from?

The era of childhood friends is over! In today’s shoujo manga, it’s all about destined encounters winning everything!

“I’m sorry… Qingxuan, I can’t accept your feelings.”

“Why? Senior, am I not good enough?” Luo Qingxuan still leaned against Xia Ruoming, unwilling to leave.

“That’s not it.” Xia Ruoming patted Luo Qingxuan’s head in her embrace, saying softly, “It’s just that I already have someone I like.”

“Could it be me?”

At that moment, both Xiao Qinghan and Xu Fengwu thought instinctively in their hearts.

Girls always have such fantasies at times like these. Even Chu Suhe was no exception. Originally, she had been preparing to wish Xia Ruoming and Luo Qingxuan lasting happiness, but when she suddenly heard Xia Ruoming’s words, her heart skipped a beat too.

Xia Ruoming and gently hugged Luo Qingxuan back, then stood up and walked towards the door.

Although Xia Ruoming had appeared decisive throughout, without any hesitation, her heart was not as calm as her exterior suggested.

A confession from a childhood friend had still stirred waves in her heart.

When Luo Qingxuan felt the warmth of Xia Ruoming’s embrace, large teardrops kept falling, her whole body trembling.

“Senior! I won’t give up! No matter who you like, I will chase after you! Even if you’re aiming for Tsinghua University, I’ll follow you there!” Luo Qingxuan shouted at Xia Ruoming’s retreating figure.

Behind those stubborn words was the sound of a girl crying alone at her desk in the classroom.

Many people’s hearts couldn’t help but feel admiration for her, and also a hint of envy.

She was really brave, confessing in front of so many people, and unlike Bai Qianyu’s confession, she had revealed all her past in front of everyone.

She was also really stubborn, even though she had been directly rejected, she still said things like she would win Xia Ruoming back.

Many of them didn’t have Luo Qingxuan’s courage, so they could never really confess to Xia Ruoming, but because of this, many beautiful things might be missed due to their own timidity. Without the courage to take the initiative, the path ahead would always remain narrow and dim.

Just like if Ji Chuan hadn’t confessed to He Ya, he would never have known that He Ya liked him too.

Perhaps due to girls’ self-restraint, or perhaps due to introverted personalities, they would never actively choose to pursue someone in their lives, only passively waiting for others’ love. What they admired was Luo Qingxuan’s courage, what they envied was that she could possess such courage.

When Luo Qingxuan learned of Xia Ruoming’s transformation, she believed this was her last chance. She chose to love the person she loved in her best years, rather than standing there reserved like a piece of wood, waiting to be lonely forever.

Perhaps even after trying hard, she would still fail, and there would still be regrets, but that kind of regret must be much lighter than never having tried at all.

At least she wouldn’t blame herself for being so cowardly in the years to come.

…

The wind on the rooftop was always cold, so it could also help clear a heated mind.

Xia Ruoming leaned against the railing and lit a cigarette.

In her previous life, she had almost forgotten about Luo Qingxuan, because after moving away they lost contact. In middle school, they were in different classes, and Luo Qingxuan, having developed feelings called love, no longer dared to actively approach Xia Ruoming. Xia Ruoming didn’t even know that the Luo Qingxuan in her class was her childhood friend. Although she had an impression of the name, she only thought it was someone with the same name.

In this world, there is a hurdle as difficult to overcome as white moonlight, called childhood friend.

Childhood friends are meant to be together.

That kind of friendship was established in pure and innocent years, and precisely because of this, it would be easier to accept each other’s feelings, and also harder to let go.

Xu Fengwu’s personality was completely different from that severe princess syndrome sufferer in the previous life.

In the previous life, she had never been confessed to by Luo Qingxuan. Because of this, when she heard Luo Qingxuan reveal herself as her childhood friend from back then, Xia Ruoming felt so shocked.

Why was this life so strange…

“Smoking alone on the rooftop?” A soft voice came from behind.

“Ah… here we go again. Every time I want to be alone, someone always appears beside me. Is this some kind of novel world?” Xia Ruoming tapped off the ash, complaining helplessly.

“Smoking isn’t good, Ruoming. Be careful, I might report you to Teacher Xiao,” Chu Suhe also leaned against the railing, whispering to Xia Ruoming. She had seen Xia Ruoming’s strange expression when leaving and followed her up, worried.

“Would you really do that, Class Monitor Chu?” Xia Ruoming lifted Chu Suhe’s chin, making eye contact with her, causing Chu Suhe to blush deeply.

“Alright… I’ll stop teasing you. I’ll listen to you and stop smoking.” After extinguishing the cigarette on the ground, Xia Ruoming threw the half-finished cigarette directly into the trash can.

“Were you and that girl very close before?”

Chu Suhe tilted her little head, seeming very curious about this.

“Hmm… perhaps,” Xia Ruoming gave an ambiguous answer.

“So, Ruoming… what do you think about her?” Chu Suhe didn’t know why she cared so much about this matter, but she really wanted to know Xia Ruoming’s answer to this question.

“Even our great class monitor asks gossip-like questions.”

“No… no, if Ruoming doesn’t want to say, you don’t have to…” She thought she had overstepped and returned to her previous timid voice.

“That child… was indeed someone who lived near my house before. We were really close when we were young, but one day I moved away, so we lost contact. She’s changed so much that I couldn’t recognize her. So I didn’t notice her in middle school and high school.”

Xia Ruoming brushed aside her bangs and said slowly.

“Her confession did shake my heart a bit, but that confession could never be accepted anyway, because I already have someone I like.”

Looking at Chu Suhe listening intently, Xia Ruoming leaned over and whispered in her ear: “That person is you, Class Monitor. But even though I said I wanted you to be my girlfriend, the monitor hasn’t replied yet.”

After saying this, Xia Ruoming made a shushing gesture, winked at Chu Suhe, and left the rooftop.

“Eh… eh… eh???” Chu Suhe’s face turned as red as an apple. She wanted to pretend to be angry and stamp her feet, telling Xia Ruoming to stop teasing her, but by the time she came to her senses, Xia Ruoming had already left the rooftop.

Did Xia Ruoming really like her… Those words that seemed like a joke, and that last gesture, didn’t seem like a serious confession no matter how you looked at it. Chu Suhe herself could never accept this idea, because no matter what, she couldn’t find any reason why Xia Ruoming would like her. Even if it was love at first sight, there should be a reason, right?

Looks, family background, ability, it seemed impossible that she would be chosen for any of these points, but she had always been so nice to her, and it couldn’t be just for fun, so why…