Push Me Away When I Come, Don't Hold Me Back When I Leave - Chapter 27

Chapter 27: What They Have, I Should Have Too

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Obviously blinded by jealousy, she had completely forgotten Xu Yihan’s teachings.

Xu Fengwu had only one thought in her mind.

How could she be so intimate with Xiao Qinghan.

How could she have other girls around her!

What she gave up, others shouldn’t have either!

At that moment, she truly realized one thing — Xia Ruoming had left her forever, abandoning her, her white moonlight, to chase after a star willing to fall for her — was that star Xiao Qinghan?

No, that’s not right, there was also Chu Suhe.

She had merely rejected her, how could she turn around and become so close with so many people?

And these little hussies, was their love so cheap that they would casually accept someone else’s affections?

These flowers used to be only for her, but now they’re being given to other girls. How could she do this, especially with purple baby’s breaths that held special meaning.

She had liked her for 5 years! And now things had become like this!

Although she also wanted to be like Xiao Qinghan, receiving the bouquet from Xia Ruoming and being praised by the shop owner saying they were a perfect match, but her jealousy-consumed self could no longer put aside her pride like she did earlier in the classroom. She was solely focused on proving that her position in Xia Ruoming’s heart was above Xiao Qinghan.

So she just said flatly: “I want flowers too, you’ll buy them for me too, right?”

Though her tone was completely calm, Xia Ruoming could see those eyes that could reflect the Milky Way were now gleaming brightly, filled with endless expectation, as if she would burst into tears if her request was refused.

At this moment, Xia Ruoming felt like her head was about to explode. She really wanted to ask, Xu Fengwu, are you crazy?

When I was there you desperately pushed me away, now that I’ve left why are you chasing after me?

She really didn’t want to buy flowers for Xu Fengwu. What if Xu Fengwu thought she was trying to flatter her again? But not buying them wouldn’t be good either. This woman becomes unreasonable when she gets upset. If Xu Fengwu actually started crying here, people who didn’t know the situation would probably think she had made this beauty cry.

“You really want them?” To prevent her reputation from being damaged and the situation from getting worse, Xia Ruoming could only force herself to ask this question.

“Mm!” With her big eyes blinking at Xia Ruoming, Xu Fengwu’s voice actually carried a hint of excitement.

Ruoming still likes me after all, she’s just sulking!

“Sigh… if you like them, I’ll buy them for you.” Xia Ruoming sighed softly, looking into the flower shop, and then complained in her heart, “I really got myself into trouble again.”

After walking around the flower shop, Xia Ruoming picked up several purple and white flowers, had the shop owner arrange them into a bouquet, and gave them to Xu Fengwu.

“Here, take them.” Xia Ruoming said helplessly, handing the bouquet to her.

Unlike Xiao Qinghan’s previous treatment, the young female shop owner not only didn’t say the flowers suited her, but instead looked at Xu Fengwu with a strange expression, one that seemed to contain a hint of… sadness?

Sweet peas.

Those were indeed carefully selected by Xia Ruoming, and they were also what she wanted to say to Xu Fengwu.

“Why is it different from Xiao Qinghan, why aren’t they baby’s breaths?” Xu Fengwu pouted, acting coy with Xia Ruoming, seemingly dissatisfied with her different treatment of her and Xiao Qinghan.

This comment completely stumped Xia Ruoming, leaving her standing there dumbfounded.

Wait, what flowers I give to Xiao Qinghan has absolutely nothing to do with you, Miss Xu.

In Xia Ruoming’s mind, Xu Fengwu wasn’t really a bad person, just too spoiled, which made her somewhat arrogant and self-centered, not valuing relationships, never caring about others’ feelings, always maintaining that kind of coldness that kept people thousands of miles away.

But this demand of ‘what others have, I should have too’ was really too ridiculous. Weren’t we already not involved with each other anymore?

“Why should it be the same as Teacher Xiao? Besides, Teacher Xiao Qinghan treated me to a meal, isn’t it perfectly normal for me to give her flowers in return?” Xia Ruoming raised her eyebrows and asked directly.

“Because… because…” The girl blinked and thought for a long time before squeezing out a reason, “You said you would always like me, so whatever they have, I should have too!”

Perhaps the past Xia Ruoming would have felt her fists clench upon hearing these words, but now she felt only calmness inside.

“Do you really think our dysfunctional relationship, my kindness to you, were all things you were entitled to?”

That voice was completely detached, devoid of any emotion. Under the moonlight, shadows crawled across the girl’s face, but Xu Fengwu could still see disappointment there, along with many other indescribable emotions.

It was precisely because of this that Xu Fengwu felt even more wronged. If Xia Ruoming still cared about her, she would either get angry or comfort her like before, but now Xia Ruoming was as cold as if she were talking to a stranger, showing no emotional fluctuations at all.

“I’m clearly your white moonlight, you said you would love me for a lifetime! I’m the one who would always illuminate your world!” Xu Fengwu’s emotions had already changed, those little pearls about to spill from her eyes.

Xia Ruoming just shook her head slightly, not responding, but instead took out the Marlboro she had bought earlier at the Momo convenience store, lighting it with a 2-yuan lighter.

Watching Xia Ruoming standing by the roadside, exhaling clouds of smoke, Xu Fengwu realized for the first time that she might not know her as well as she thought.

Did Xia Ruoming smoke? She never had the smell of smoke on her, and never carried things like lighters. Whether at school or at her home, she always appeared to be a good girl.

When did she learn to smoke? Was it after being rejected?

Without thinking further, Xu Fengwu directly grabbed Xia Ruoming’s wrist.

“Quit it, don’t smoke, it smells bad. It’s not good for your health, and I don’t like it.”

“Can’t quit anymore.” Only then did Xu Fengwu see Xia Ruoming’s expression clearly. That pretty face had become pale at some point, and her tragic smile was heartbreaking.

After her rebirth, Xia Ruoming had thought about quitting smoking, right when she first couldn’t find her Marlboro by her side, she had already had this thought.

But… she couldn’t quit anymore.

Because her rebirth didn’t come without a price. She had wondered why she would be favored by heaven and given new life.

As she gradually adapted to this body, she discovered that rebirth wasn’t a blessing, perhaps it was even a punishment.

Higher intelligence, better physique, photographic memory, vast information from the future world… fate had already price-tagged all these gifts.

The stress responses and psychological trauma from her previous life were also brought to this life.

During times of extreme emotions, she would still experience mild cognitive confusion; she would still fear those open, emptily vast places; though there were no scars on her wrists, they would still ache when touched; when seeing Xu Fengwu, those messy emotions would still surface in her mind.