Palace Struggles Is Also Crazy - Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Do You Think Being a Concubine is Easy? (1)

-Section 1-

As soon as Consort De returned from visiting her family, she heard that a new member had recently been added to the harem. The newcomer had a significant background, supposedly a beauty presented by the Western tribe, and the Emperor casually gave her the title of “Consort Li” before handing her over to the Empress.

The senior palace maid, Gui Hua, was inserting new woolen flowers into Consort De’s hair while reminding her, “Yesterday, Her Majesty the Empress announced that since you’re back and all the personnel are present, there will be a small meeting in Kun Ning Palace this morning. You should arrive early to secure a good seat.”

Consort De didn’t respond immediately. As a veteran of the palace, she had been chosen to give a summary after meetings due to her good speaking skills. She estimated that this meeting was likely related to the new Consort Li and asked, “Have you seen the Consort Li?”

Gui Hua nodded.

“What does she look like?” Consort De asked.

“Ordinary. She’s no match for Your Ladyship’s heavenly beauty,” Gui Hua replied.

“Tell me the truth,” Consort De pressed.

“…She’s just okay. Maybe a little prettier than Your Ladyship, but Your Ladyship doesn’t rely on your looks to survive. We love your noble and icy demeanor and pure soul,” Gui Hua said firmly.

Consort De nodded, “That’s true.”

Section 2:

Consort De finished dressing and left Chu Xiu Palace. Seeing that she still had some time, and the Empress was probably still jogging in the Imperial Garden, she decided to visit Consort Xian. She brought two local specialties from her hometown – Changbai Mountain ginseng. As it happened, Consort Xian had just received a new batch of cosmetics and was having an artist draw advertisements. After receiving the ginseng, Consort Xian generously offered many samples.

Never let two women encounter cosmetics when they’re bored, even if it’s just samples. They can chat as if no one else is around until the end of time.

Just as they were getting along famously, they almost forgot about the meeting. Not being late would be considered diligent. Consort De reluctantly went to Kun Ning Palace with Consort Xian.

When they arrived, they were indeed the last two to arrive. However, the Empress hadn’t arrived yet, and everyone was still in a state of disorganization, gossiping about recent scandals.

Consort De walked over and overheard some of the conversation. It was nothing more than “The Ministry of Rites proposed that the Emperor restart the practice of flipping cards in the harem, but it was rejected because the Empress’s name wasn’t on the cards, so what’s the point of flipping them?” and “The Crown Prince failed his exam again and was chased by the Empress throughout the Forbidden City. The Empress, an athletic genius, discovered that she couldn’t catch up to the Crown Prince, which led to the discovery of the Crown Prince’s athletic talent.” After listening for a while, she understood the gist of it.

Just as she was about to comment, she felt a chill on the back of her neck. Before she could turn around and see who it was, a piece of silk had already been draped around her neck. When she turned around, she saw a tall and beautiful woman standing in front of her, with sun-kissed skin and shiny eyes.
The woman smiled, revealing a row of pearly white teeth.

The woman’s exotic clothing and unfamiliar appearance confirmed that she was likely the new Consort Li, not from the Central Plains.

As a concubine of a great nation, Consort De couldn’t lose her dignity in front of a foreigner. She stood up straight, raised her head, and put her arm up, striking a pose like a peony blooming in the center of the hall. She coughed coldly and opened her mouth, unexpectedly hesitating for a moment. However, it was just a moment, and she quickly regained her composure.

With a dignified expression, she said, “Hello, hi, Sawatdeekha?”
(TL : Sawatdeekha is a Thai greeting used by women meaning Hello…)

“????” Consort Li’s face was full of question marks.
If her face were any darker, it might become the first meme in the history of the Great Yin dynasty.

Then she turned around and gave a thumbs-up to Consort Liang, who was standing next to her, and said in fluent Mandarin, “Indeed, the culture of the Central Plains is profound. Was what that lady just said a dialect from her hometown?”

Comsort De decided that she was going to turn against Consort Li.

However, it’s impolite to hit someone who’s smiling, so Consort De held the silk fabric around her neck, thought for a moment, and furrowed her brows, asking, “Why did you hang a piece of white silk around my neck?”

Before the new Consort Li could answer, Consort Liang snorted and said, “You’re so clueless. That’s a Hada, a symbol of blessing.”

“Look who’s talking, you’re so full of yourself,” Consort De said without giving Consort Liang any face, as she was an old acquaintance.

Consort Liang didn’t bother to respond and huffed, walking away.

Consort De and Consort Li were left staring at each other. Consort De couldn’t help but ask after a while, “Sister, the rouge on your face is quite unique. Where did you buy it?”

Although Consort Liang was no longer there, her voice still drifted back, “I’ve told you to read more and talk less. That’s called ‘plateau red’.”

Consort De, a concubine of the nation, lost her temper on the spot and rolled up her sleeves, ready to duel with Consort Liang.
No one could stop her.

Just in time, the Empress appeared and silenced the entire room.

-Section 3-

Everyone took their seats and looked at the Empress. Based on their daily experience, the Empress’s meetings were unlike the Empress Dowager’s.
The Empress was always concise and to the point.

But obviously, this time was different. The Empress’s face showed hesitation, as if she didn’t know how to start.
This was rare.

The crowd looked at the Empress with a hint of concern.

Finally, the Empress hesitated and managed to open her mouth, “Actually…”

The crowd: “Ah.”

The Empress: “That thing…”

The crowd: “Oh?”

The Empress: “…”
What kind of habits were these?

Consort De took the lead, “Your Majesty, do you have something difficult to say? Don’t worry, just say it. We’ll support you, sister.”

The rest of the crowd: “Yes, yes, yes.”

The Empress was touched, “Sisters, you’re really loyal.”

Consort De said, “It’s nothing. You’re our darling, after all.”

The darling felt pressured, “It’s like this. There’s a task to assign to everyone. Consort Li is a new member of our family, and she’s new to the Forbidden City. It’s huge and unfamiliar. We need to work together to help her get familiar with the environment…”

Before she could finish, Noble Consort Xi jumped up, “Me, me, me! Sister Empress, let me do it. I’ll show her the rich artistic atmosphere of our harem. I can even make a clay figurine for her!”

The crowd: “…”

Consort Li: “?”

The Empress said gently, “Not yet.”

Then Consort De spoke up enthusiastically, “Can we book Master Guo again? I think Consort Li needs to understand our national culture. If Master Guo is too busy, Master Yu can do it too. Even a solo comic performance would be okay… I mean, solo performances are good for spreading national culture.”

The Empress said gently, “Not yet.”

Consort Shu said, “I wonder if Consort Li likes pets…”

The Empress interrupted, “She doesn’t have any. She doesn’t want any.”

The Empress looked around and, with a sense of resignation, turned to Consort Liang.

Consort Liang sensed it and stood up.

The Empress quickly said, “Stay calm, don’t get excited. Sister is a talented woman, if I assign Consort Li to you for two days, would you be willing to take her under your wing?”

Consort Liang replied coldly, “Oh.”

The Empress advised earnestly, “Pay attention to the scale, try to take the essence and discard the dross.”

Consort Liang raised an eyebrow, “For example?”

The Empress said, “For example, walk properly, don’t float. Don’t make hand gestures, focus on Zither, chess, calligraphy, and painting. For the four arts, show only what’s acceptable. When discussing (Golden Lotus), just touch on it briefly.”

Consort Liang said, “…In that case, I won’t teach her. We artistic youths have vast knowledge, and most of it wouldn’t pass the review.”

Consort Liang’s face was expressionless, “If there’s nothing else, I’ll take my leave.”

The Queen nodded, “Exit to the right. The guards are changing shifts, you can float.”

Consort Liang’s face remained expressionless, “Thank you.”

The rest of the crowd was still enthusiastic, with Consort Xian already pulling out face masks.

The Empress felt a sense of despair, “This is my difficulty.”

Finally, she looked at Consort Li, who was waiting to be assigned, and thought for a long time. She could only send her to accompany the Empress Dowager in playing mahjong for now.

The Empress slammed her hand on the table, “That’s it, meeting adjourned! Consort Xian, stay behind and introduce the new shades to me.”

-Section 4-

Less than half a day later, Consort Li was sent back by Rong Mama, who was attending to the Empress Dowager.

The manner in which she was sent back suggested that Consort Li was hot to handle.

The Empress asked tentatively, “Is Consort Li too foolish and annoying the Empress Dowager?”

“Not at all. Consort Li is very smart,” Rong Mama said.
“It’s just that she’s too smart. She played eight rounds of mahjong with the Empress Dowager and the others, and she won every single round, taking all the money the Empress Dowager had won from the other concubines… The Empress Dowager said she doesn’t want to play mahjong for a while and asked me to remind Your Majesty that she thinks Consort Li’s family might have sent her to the palace as a plot…”

The Empress said, “…Well, at least it’s good that she’s cured the Empress Dowager of her sedentary habits. If she doesn’t want to play mahjong, she can try tai chi.”

The Empress looked at Consort Li, who smiled innocently at her, “Sister Empress, the Empress Dowager is so nice to me. She let me win every round. She’s the most kind-hearted elder I’ve ever met!”

The Empress said, “…As long as you’re happy.”

It was almost time for dinner, so the Empress asked the kitchen to stew beef and roast lamb leg. She invited Consort Li to join her for a meal. Before dinner, the Crown Prince came over to pay his respects after school, and the Empress left for a short while.
When she returned, she was stunned.

The table was empty, with seven or eight dishes and bowls completely cleaned out.

The Empress asked, “Did you eat all of this by yourself?”

Consort Li nodded, looking a bit embarrassed, “I’m about 50% full. Can I have another roast lamb leg?”

The Empress said, “…Good. Being able to eat is a blessing.”

After dinner, they took a nap as usual. The Empress considered that Consort Li might not be used to the bed and might not sleep well without someone to keep her company, so she pulled Consort Li to sleep with her. Half an hour later, the Empress stood by the bed and had an illusion that the entire Kun Ning Palace was shaking slightly.

The little Crown Prince came out of the western warm pavilion, rubbing his eyes and yawning. He pointed at Consort Li, who was sleeping soundly, drooling, and snoring, and asked, “Mother, why is this sister making thunder noises?”

The Empress thought to herself that the Empress Dowager might be right – Consort Li’s arrival in the palace might be a plot.

The Empress decided to send Consort Li to visit different palaces to spread the burden. She couldn’t bear it alone.

-Section 5-

Consort Li’s first stop was Consort Liang’s Yan Xi Palace. When she arrived, there was no one in the palace, and there was no furniture either. There were only rows of cabinets filled with various humanoid dolls, all exquisite and lifelike.

Before coming, the Empress had asked her, “Are you usually brave?”

Consort Li said she was okay, and she would treat horror stories as cold jokes.

So the Empress was relieved.

Consort Li thought the Empress’s concern was unnecessary. What she saw was just a row of normal dolls. She picked one up to observe carefully, and suddenly, she felt a chill on the back of her neck.

Then a gust of cold wind blew by, and a bony hand reached out from behind and rested on her shoulder. Consort Li shuddered, and the arm of the doll in her hand broke off.

Immediately, Yan Xi Palace echoed with Consort Liang’s scream, “Ahhh, my precious doll! My hand-made doll!!”
—
Golden Lotus – is a Ming dynasty vernacular novel containing S*xual contents.