Online Dating, Fooled 800 Times - Chapter 4

“Finished so soon?” From one door over, he heard his annoying sister’s voice draw closer. “You didn’t mess up right? Did the leader scold you? Were you fined?”

 

“…” Yue Qing swiveled his chair towards the door, leaning back and removing his glasses. “Is this all you do in the game?”

 

Behind him, a white-robed swordsman with the word [Rush] on his head stood on the bustling arched bridge, all chat and notification windows completely blocked.

 

“What do you mean? Dungeons are only one aspect of PvE. I actually think PvP is more fun.” Yue Xia held a freshly washed peach and nibbled it while leaning over to glance at his computer screen. “Why did you close all the chat channels?”

 

“You don’t have enough military training normally, and now you’re going online for extra practice.” Yue Qing looked at his sister coldly, feeling that she looked like a monkey the way she gobbled down a peach. Unable to bear it any longer, he pushed her aside. “Don’t let its juice drip on my desk. Also, if I don’t block those message channels, random people always privately message me about all sorts of things.”

 

He was wearing a mismatched pair of home clothes. The trousers were the same ones he’d worn since high school. The fabric had been washed for years, making it quite comfortable and soft. He had just showered, his hair unstyled, slightly curled, and looked nice to the touch. The plain ring on his left index finger gleamed dimly in the light, and from more than ten minutes of clumsily typing on the keyboard, a vein now faintly protruded on the back of his hand.

 

A stainless steel watchband sat haphazardly on a rack beside the table—from a distance, it looked decidedly unsuitable for an online gamer’s desktop. Aside from a garbled, multicolored gaming console that had been shoved in from nowhere, the solid wood surface was spotless. A few half-read books lay beside a silver mouse, a wilted cactus clung to the corner, and near the headphones was a cartoon white goose keychain that looked like something won from a street vending machine.

 

A room with a distinctly lived-in feel.

 

“Isn’t it normal for people to PM you?” Yue Xia said. “There are only five Tianwu weapons available server-wide right now, and that friend of yours who gave you this account is ranked first on the server. They all probably want to team up with you to play ranked.”

 

Yue Qing pursed his lips in mild disapproval.

 

Yue Xia didn’t even bother turning her head, “What’s wrong?”

 

Yue Qing frowned and asked, “What does C-P-d-d mean?”

 

“…” His question was posed so seriously that Yue Xia felt humored. “Who sent this to you?”

 

“I didn’t reply.”

 

“It means they want to have a passionate online romance with you.” Yue Xia wiped her hands clean of peach juice, then, taking control of his account, kicked the Bodybuilding Sect female player off the back of his horse. She explained seriously, “Have you ever heard this saying? Those who look for online romance can be fooled 800 times yet still believe in true love. Sometimes, when fate comes, you can’t even stop it.”

 

Yue Qing looked a little speechless.

 

Though he didn’t say it out loud, the meaning was clear—if his friend of ten years hadn’t insisted on his help, he probably wouldn’t have anything to do with online games in his life.

 

In college, three of the four people in his dorm played Qiankun. They enthusiastically formed a team called “Violently Tempered Patriarch.” 

 

…Yue Qing was lucky he had no interest in games, otherwise this patch of dark history would have haunted him for at least half his life.

 

A while ago, Qiankun celebrated its tenth anniversary, sending out recall letters to all longtime players. Coincidentally, Lu Ze was planning to celebrate his anniversary with his international girlfriend, who he had originally met through Qiankun.

 

Simply put, Lu Ze wanted to stage a grand in-game ceremony, known to everyone in the server, so that even passing dogs would have to know about his stunning romance. Under the banner of sentimentality, he cajoled the other three people in his dorm to return to the game to help with the set up.

 

Although Yue Qing didn’t play, he had helped his roommates out in emergencies back when they lived together, so he knew the basic mechanics.

 

To get him onboard, Lu Ze was more than willing to take care of everything. Two weeks ago, he bought Yue Qing an account from the trading forum and told him to try it out. However, even after a week, Yue Qing still couldn’t find the game’s charm. He didn’t even bother to change the old ID. He didn’t like the original owner’s guild name “Patriarch, Tang Tang is Back” and had immediately quit after logging in.

 

“The party leader is asking to privately chat.” Yue Xia pointed at the [Wild Female Baboon] with a speech bubble above her head, asking in confusion, “What does she mean by you rolling the dice? Isn’t this a dungeon where all you have to do is bid for equipment?”

 

Yue Qing paused, “I rolled.”

 

Yue Xia was startled by the message in the bubble, “And when did you roll the treasure chest?”

 

It was the game interface that prompted him to click the dice before the countdown ended. Yue Qing didn’t really understand. 

 

“What’s the problem?”

 

“Hurry up and explain it to the other party. Compensate her with group hiring fees or buy her a purple item of the same level.” It’s a common mistake for newbies, clicking on anything they see. Yue Xia choked, “That’s considered stealing gear. Them not immediately cussing you out on the world channel is already considered good-tempered.”

 

Yue Qing: “…………”

 

Huh?

 

He slipped his glasses back on his nose. Then, with unpracticed ease, he found [Man-eating Sunflower] in the team list. Still baffled, he asked, “Then why didn’t anyone stop me just now?”

 

“You’re decked out in level 16 enhanced, top-grade purple gear, carrying a Heavenly-grade weapon, and have an RBF. The other side’s just a poor little Kongshan with many missing pieces. And you’re wondering why they didn’t stop you?” Yue Xia glared at her brother and asked, “What’s the difference between that and you holding a machete and asking the crowd why no one dares to approach you?”

 

Yue Qing closed his eyes, “You’re so noisy…”

 

Amidst the bustling crowd of the main city, following the green line indicated by the game, his cursor finally located the poor, ragged Kongshan.

 

As he clicked on her, she also clicked on him, and the distant line connecting them instantly turned red.

 

And the ID [Man-eating Sunflower] was also bright red.

 

He was stunned. Although he didn’t understand what a red ID signified, he had a hunch that the other person wasn’t in a friendly camp.

 

Behind him, Yue Xia chuckled with schadenfreude:

 

“Mr. Hero, how have you entered the Jianghu for just a week and already been added to someone’s enemy list?”

 

————

 

After a long and fruitless few hours, Xiang Kui stood outside the trading post, preparing to sell the uselessly flashy items obtained from the dungeon run. While digitally processing ingredients into candied haws, she privately chatted with [Wild Female Baboon].

 

[[Private Chat] Wild Female Baboon: I’m so sorry, it was my mistake. >< I’ll leave you a spot in the raid tomorrow and take you on another run.]

 

[[Private Chat] Man-eating Kui: It’s okay, it’s okay~]

 

[[Private Chat] Wild Female Baboon: Ahhh, that’s good!!]

 

Xiang Kui cheerfully crunched on a mint candy from in front of the screen.

 

As if it’s ok!

 

[[Private Chat] Wild Female Baboon: Actually, I really didn’t want you to join the group just now. Those guys from the Prairie Fire guild opened voice chat and asked me to add you. You know, I’m a pure PVE player after all… QQ]

 

Pure PVE refers to players who only go into dungeons and bosses and aren’t competitive play oriented. [Prairie Fire] is one of the better known large PVP guilds on the server. Even if only one assassin like [Punishment] were to show up, camping at the dungeon entrance killing people, it would be annoying enough.

 

[[Private Chat] Man-eating Sunflower: It’s nothing really~ It’s not your fault.]

 

[[Private Chat] Man-eating Sunflower: But, it seems that guy earlier, Rush, isn’t in a guild?]

 

[[Private Chat] Wild Female Baboon: You mean that big boss? Wasn’t he originally in [Without a Pair]? I think he switched to a small guild with close friends a while ago, there aren’t many people in it. He only joined for half a day and then quit again. I guess he might have misclicked.]

 

[[Private Chat] Wild Female Baboon: I’ve played with him in dungeons before, and the big boss used to be pretty talkative. Rumor has it that he was deeply traumatized after his last failed relationship. Basically, he was heartbroken, not to mention he stopped laughing and even stopped talking… Of course, it’s just a rumor! I’m just saying it casually, you interpret it however you want!]

 

Xiang Kui couldn’t help but sneer. What a dog, really going at great lengths to maintain your big boss persona. Your heart is cold, yet you’re still so quick to snatch a bid for your apprentice’s equipment. How terrifying!

 

[Private Chat] Wild Female Baboon: But… Do you two have some conflict? There’s no way right. He must have just made a mistake.]

 

Hmm?

 

Xiang Kui paused.

 

[[Private Chat] Man-eating Sunflower: You believe that I’m a new account owner now?]

 

[[Private Chat] Wild Female Baboon: Actually, I wasn’t sure before, but I confirmed it after we left the dungeon.]

 

[[Private Chat] Man-eating Sunflower: How? Is my technique that different?]

 

She’s always been a PVP player, not that big on clearing dungeons. She’s been following the recommended Kongshan skill cycle, so it should be pretty close.

 

[[Private Chat] Wild Female Baboon: Leave the group real quick.]

 

The moment Xiang Kui left, the Wild Female Baboon’s ID suddenly turned bright red: “…………”

 

Really, enemies left and right, more miserable than a dog’s life.

 

Xiang Kui quietly shuffled a little further away from the other party, to avoid being suddenly attacked. Meanwhile, she calmly sipped her cold beer.

 

[[Private Chat] Wild Female Baboon: Just to clarify, it was you who attacked me first, so I added you back. You can’t see it probably because your Enemy List has been cleared…]

 

[[Private Chat] Man-Eating Sunflower: I’m a little curious, what was her reason for attacking you in the first place? OvO]

 

[[Private Chat] Wild Female Baboon: I was doing the painted boat quest on the Qinhuai River, and she said she was in a bad mood today, and I dared to wear red clothing. Then she had two assassin players kill me until I dropped 3 levels.]

 

Xiang Kui’s jaw nearly dropped on the table.

 

[[Private Chat] Man-Eating Sunflower: Huh?!]

 

[[Private Chat] Wild Mother Baboon: So basically, I just confirmed the account changed hands. Otherwise, you might have already posted Rush’s personal information and headshot on the forum, with his ID number as the caption.]

 

Because [Rush] couldn’t remember his ID number, I helped create a backup. So warm and thoughtful.

 

[[Private Chat] Man-Eating Sunflower: ………]

 

[[Private Chat] Man-Eating Sunflower: /Knock the Wooden Fish]

 

After adding [Wild Female Baboon] as a friend, Xiang Kui’s Friend List finally displayed more than 0 entries. While the other player continued to run dungeons, Xiang Kui teleported back to the Kongshan Sect map for ten seconds, entered the Canglong Forbidden Land, and thoughtfully opened the guild list.

 

The sects in Qiankun each have their own dedicated maps and sect NPCs. The relationships between the sects are complex, and the NPCs have different personalities and interpersonal relationships. The Forbidden Land of Canglong is off-limits to all but the Kongshan sect, and combat is prohibited. Many fellow disciples simply stand there idle to grind for experience.

 

[[Sect] Play Kongshan again and I’ll slap you: Today, Sect Leader, coordinates?]

 

[[Sect] Look, they’re dead again: Two minutes ago, someone said they entered the Forbidden Land of Canglong. I rushed over and saw they were gone again.]

 

No wonder there are so many people in the Forbidden Land of Canglong.

 

In the worldview, Kongshan is a hidden sect, extremely mysterious. Players hanging around the Kongshan Sect Leader NPC had a chance of receiving a “Predecessor’s Gift” Buff, and rumor has it it may trigger a special quest. However, because the sect leader in question is often unavailable, most Kongshan players queue up to visit Yun Xian, the sect leader of the neighboring Jiange Sect, before the big guild war event. It’s really quite a sight.

 

A couple people were watching her. Xiang Kui moved to a corner and continued to check the guild list.

 

Qiankun respects everyone’s playstyle. Not joining a guild or faction does not affect equipment acquisition. But this is a large-scale game after all, and where there are people, there’s the Jianghu. Sometimes, a single guild with dozens of members waves a flag, and two fists are no match for four. No matter how good one person’s equipment or skills are, can they truly defeat an entire group?

 

According to [Wild Female Baboon], [Rush] hasn’t shown any interest in joining a new guild since leaving his original guild.

 

With a hate-all-scumbags mentality combined with the personal offense of treasure chest stealing, Xiang Kui was determined to get back at him.

 

With hundreds of guilds, large and small, on a single server, choosing the right one is a daunting task.

 

Xiang Kui has been playing Qiankun for eight years and has only been in four guilds, all of which were just for the sake of numbers. However, watching the bloody battles on the world channel and loudspeakers, she was able to develop a rough selection criteria.

 

Although large guilds have large members, they also have requirements for contribution points and equipment strength, and participation in the weekly faction wars is mandatory, making them unsuitable.

 

Small guilds are too small, with perhaps no more than ten active members. Most of them are casual, retired players who enjoy farming, building houses, taking screenshots, and the like. Probably can’t play with them..

 

A regular guild with a moderate number of members, good guild benefits, and a high degree of freedom is ideal.

 

Xiang Kui spent a long time searching, her vision almost blurry, before finally finding a medium-sized guild:

 

[We Are All Crazy]: Tianzhu / Level 3 / 28 Players

 

[Guild Introduction: The Tianzhu Small Guild is looking for passionate PVP players! Full benefits, including an alchemy area, melee bonuses, and stunning scenery in the large guild territory! Most members are veteran players, so if anything goes wrong, just shout in the guild channel and we’ll guarantee a response! /love/love/love]

 

Tianzhu and Mojiang are the two opposing factions in Qiankun. Every week, the battles are a chaotic melee with thousands of players. Xiang Kui doesn’t have a particular faction preference; she’ll just join a guild that suits her.

 

She opened her profile and applied to join the Tianzhu faction. [System prompt: You have submitted your application to join the [We Are All Crazy] guild!]

 

Eyes drawn to the prompt, Xiang Kui also glanced at the World Channel.

 

[[World] Warlord Li Li: Is playing dirty tricks fun? [Man-eating Sunflower]]

 

[[World] Precious Little Foam: Aren’t you just waiting for me? You and the wild boar combined to reduce the health bar to 100%, right? [Man-eating Sunflower]]

 

[[World] Everyday is Sweet: LMAO This is like a TV series with ongoing episodes…]

 

[[World] Ami Tofu: Have you guys had enough. Why are you treating the World Channel like it’s your own living room? The same trivial things are being discussed here every day. /Speechless.]

 

[[World] Precious Little Foam: Hey upstairs, if you don’t like it, you can just ignore it. Why stick your nose in other people’s business?]

 

[[World] Ami Tofu: What? You’re the dorm manager? What, didn’t inflate the bid enough just now to satisfy yourself? /Disdain]

 

[[World] Jiujiang: Take advantage of the chaos to fight GG++++++ [Chiyou Ruins·Ruins] Quickly farm 7=3 and come to Jiange Demon Cult for damage++++++]

 

[[World] Warlord Li Li: If you don’t understand, shut up. Unless she apologizes and quits the game, I won’t stop until she’s dead.]

 

The person who had lost equipment big time to the wild boar attack seemed to have logged off. Deeply affected.

 

Before Xiang Kui could even spam “/pig head” to mock her in chat, a faint, ethereal laugh from an old man filled the background of her headphones.

 

The sound came from the back of her head. She subconsciously manipulated her character to turn her face, only to find herself frozen in place—

 

In the scene, a mountain mist swept across the lavender branches of the forbidden area, instantly enveloping the entire field of vision. Within the hazy mist, a figure in white fluttered his sleeves, his fingertips gently touching her forehead.

 

[The immortal stroked my head, and I received eternal life through marriage. You were unable to move, momentarily dazed, feeling only the icy cold of her fingertips.

 

[Mysterious person: “Child, go to the Ice Mortar at the North Pole. There you will find what you seek.”]

 

[System prompt: You have received a [Gift from the Kongshan Sect Leader].]

 

At the same time, a yellow message representing the GM appeared on the World Channel:

 

[Auspicious signs from heaven, great luck! Congratulations to the knight [Man-eating Sunflower] for triggering the [Ice Mortar Adventure] in the [Canglong Forbidden Land]. The executor was [Kongshan Sect Leader]. The reward is one (1) Heaven-grade Gemstone, a weapon common to all internal martial arts sects!]