Little Palace Maid Desires a Higher Seat of Honor - Chapter 55

Chapter 55: “Why does each time feel more shameful than the last.”

Tan Yuanchu subtly furrowed his brows. Just before she crouched down, he stopped her.
“Get up.”

Su Guipin’s demeanor had calmed considerably. The smile on her face disappeared, and she returned to her usual cool and aloof self.

Tan Yuanchu acted as if he hadn’t noticed anything unusual about her. He waved at Yun Si.
Yun Si glanced at him, then at Su Guipin, hesitated slightly, and after a moment, obediently walked over.

Once she approached, Tan Yuanchu raised his hand and lightly touched her forehead. Feeling a hint of coolness, he said in a cold tone, “Just recovered from illness and you’re already out in the cold wind, trying to stay in bed for another half month?”

It sounded like a reprimand, but anyone could hear the true concern behind his words.

Yun Si held a red plum branch. She opened her mouth as if to say something, but in the end, she just drooped her eyes listlessly and responded meekly, “This servant is fine.”

When Su Guipin saw Yun Si appear, all of the Emperor’s attention immediately shifted to her, which made Su Guipin quite irritated.
What could be wrong with Yun Si?

Out in the cold wind?

Su Guipin glanced at the crane cloak Yun Si was wearing.

The fur tribute from Nanyao last year—His Majesty had some sent to Cining Palace, but the rest had been kept in his private treasury.
Su Guipin hadn’t expected to see it now on Yun Si.
Everyone said she had recently gained favor, but she herself had never received such a gift from the Emperor.

And just look—does Yun Si even have the slightest air of a servant, being pampered like this?

Su Guipin was inwardly full of complaints. She subtly clenched her handkerchief. During her time in the palace, she had at least learned to be more cautious, so she didn’t show anger. She raised her eyes and said coolly, “I found it curious not seeing Yun Si girl these days. So it turns out she was ill. Is she better now?”

Yun Si bowed to Su Guipin.
“Thank you for your concern, Mistress Su Guipin. This servant is already well.”

Su Guipin was choked by her words.
What a way to flatter herself, who was concerned about her?

Tan Yuanchu looked at Yun Si as if nothing had happened. Seeing her acting so respectful and proper, how could he not know that she was unhappy?

But what was she upset about?

Because he had accompanied Su Guipin to admire the plum blossoms?

Tan Yuanchu gave a cold laugh inwardly and couldn’t help but recall what happened a month ago.

At that time, Yun Si had only been sick for a day or two. The chill had come on fiercely. She couldn’t even sleep peacefully, her cheeks flushed with a sickly red, burning hot all over, groaning weakly on the bed.

The imperial physician had prescribed medicine, but it wasn’t taking effect.

When Tan Yuanchu went to see her, she lay in his arms, clutching his sleeve tightly, her tears falling in streams, calling out to him from time to time.

She loved to cry, but usually only did so in bed. A third of it was real emotion; the other seven parts were just to fool him. Only this time, Tan Yuanchu could tell she was truly in pain, so ill that her mind was a bit unclear.

Holding her in his arms, Tan Yuanchu’s expression was visibly tinged with anger. Everyone knew a severe chill could take a life. He looked coldly at the imperial physician, who was drenched in sweat.

“You can’t even treat a simple chill. What use do I have for you?”

He didn’t raise his voice or speak harshly, but the calmer he was, the more terrified the imperial physician felt.

Perhaps it was because women often murmured about such things, but Tan Yuanchu actually had a sudden thought—
Could it be that they looked down on her because she had no official status, and that’s why they hadn’t taken her treatment seriously?

Tan Yuanchu knew very well that this thought might have no real basis, but it was hard for him not to think that way.

He replaced several imperial physicians one after another for her, until one of them finally said,
“This side room is too cold—that’s why the girl’s condition keeps relapsing.”

The room was dim. Tan Yuanchu lowered his gaze to look at the girl :
She was lying quietly in his arms, her breath warm against him. Clearly, she had been kept close to him, clothed in silk and fed delicacies, yet she seemed to have lost even more weight, so thin and frail she looked like a sheet of paper.

Tan Yuanchu withdrew his gaze and gave a cold order, “Go prepare the warm room.”

Xu Shunfu knew full well how bad the Emperor’s mood had been these past days. He didn’t dare to advise anything, and instead led the servants to clean the warm room thoroughly.
Tan Yuanchu personally brought her there, draped the crane cloak over her, pulled the hood down to cover her cheeks completely.
Doing his best not to let her be exposed to even a hint of cold wind.
With the floor heating in the warm room, the entire hall became especially cozy.

Only after all this fuss did her condition begin to ease a little.

And yet as soon as she regained consciousness, she turned hostile and pretended not to know him.

It happened to be the first day of the month. When he went to see her again, the warm room doors were tightly shut and he was not allowed in.

Tan Yuanchu was so angry he actually laughed.

Xu Shunfu tried to speak on her behalf,
“The girl is afraid of passing her illness to Your Majesty.”

Tan Yuanchu suddenly let out a cold laugh.

When she had been seriously ill and clinging to him, why hadn’t she said she might infect him then?

The doors were tightly shut and wouldn’t open, and inside the hall she was still speaking in a muffled voice, “Today is the first day of the month—Your Majesty should be going to Kunning Palace.”

She wouldn’t open the door, and was even trying to send him away.

Tan Yuanchu’s gaze turned colder, and he said mockingly, “If all the consorts in the harem were as worry-free as you, there wouldn’t be so many troubles.”

With that, without waiting for Yun Si to say anything else to drive him away, Tan Yuanchu turned and left.

He hadn’t minded that she was seriously ill, but the moment she got better, she put on this kind of act.
Was it truly because she was worried he’d catch her cold, or was it for her own sake—afraid others would use it to accuse her?
She herself knew best in her heart.

Tan Yuanchu was angry with her and hadn’t visited her for several days.

And now, seeing her again—was this very moment.

Everything had gone according to her wishes, so what was she unhappy about now?

Thinking of this, Tan Yuanchu withdrew the hand that had been resting on her forehead. His mood turned cold.

But Su Guipin had noticed the red plum branch in Yun Si’s hand. She looked at Tan Yuanchu and asked, “Your Majesty had Yun Si girl come pick red plum blossoms—what is it for?”

She asked as if it were mere curiosity, but anyone could hear the implication behind her words:
In the palace, servants had no right to pick flowers. No matter how much they liked them, at most they could only collect fallen petals near the end of the season.

Su Guipin didn’t believe that His Majesty had specially instructed Yun Si to come to the plum grove to pick flowers—
It could only have been Yun Si acting on her own.

In other words, Su Guipin was essentially accusing Yun Si of breaking palace rules.

Yun Si tightened her grip on the red plum branch. Before she could speak, Tan Yuanchu lazily lifted his eyelids and looked toward Su Guipin, suddenly asking, “You’re very curious?”

Su Guipin frowned and looked at the Emperor with surprise and uncertainty, unable to figure out his meaning—was he displeased?

Suddenly, Tan Yuanchu raised his hand and flicked at the red plum blossom Su Guipin had just pinned into her hair. The flower drifted down lightly.
Su Guipin instantly froze, her whole body going rigid.

Tan Yuanchu seemed not to notice anything amiss, and said lightly, “Don’t wear red plum blossoms again. Red plum doesn’t suit you.”

A simple sentence, devoid of emotion, as if he were merely answering her earlier question. The red plum fell to the ground, but Su Guipin’s face instantly turned pale, his merciless words piercing her so sharply that she nearly burst into tears.

Xu Shunfu lowered his head.

The atmosphere around them became faintly tense. Tan Yuanchu didn’t look at Su Guipin again and turned to Yun Si:

“Picked enough?”

Yun Si hesitated and shook her head. Tan Yuanchu took the red plum branch from her hand. His fingers brushed against hers—cold as ice, with no warmth at all.
Tan Yuanchu said nothing, only grew even more indifferent. He tossed the red plum branch to Xu Shunfu.

“Let the servants handle things like this in the future.”

Xu Shunfu, understanding the moment perfectly, asked her preferences and then directed a few palace maids to pick red plum branches for her.

Su Guipin stood to the side, expressionless as she watched the whole scene, suppressing the embarrassment in her heart.

She had accused Yun Si of breaking palace rules by picking plum blossoms, and the Emperor simply ordered people to pick them for her.
Every one of his actions was clearly a slap in Su Guipin’s face—on Yun Si’s behalf.

Once the maids had picked a full armful of plum blossoms, Tan Yuanchu led Yun Si back to Yangxin Hall, completely forgetting that he had originally come with someone else to admire the plum trees.

Perhaps he remembered—but he didn’t care.

—

On the way back to Yangxin Hall, Xu Shunfu glanced at the Emperor, then at Yun Si girl.
Neither looked at the other, and neither spoke.
The air between them was especially quiet and heavy with tension.

Xu Shunfu couldn’t help but sigh inwardly—what were these two ancestors fighting about now?

When Yun Si was nearly recovered from her illness, she had already moved back to the side chamber. She and Tan Yuanchu were not walking the same path. After entering Yangxin Hall, she took the red plum branches from the arms of the palace maid and was about to turn around and head back to her room.

Tan Yuanchu’s expression turned cold.

Yun Si didn’t look at him. Having just recovered from a serious illness, she was dressed in many layers, with a crane cloak draped over her as well, wrapped up like a ball.
She held the red plum branches in her arms, looking as if the weight of them might crush her.

Tan Yuanchu glanced at Xu Shunfu. Xu Shunfu immediately turned and ran toward Yun Si.

“Girl, allow this servant to carry them for you.”

Yun Si refused. She carried the plum branches herself and left alone.

Back in the side chamber, Yun Si returned hugging the red plum branches. She let out a soft breath, her hands ice cold.
She took out some ointment and applied it, only then turning to look at the pile of red plum branches.

She tugged at the corner of her lips—feeling like she had brought this hardship upon herself.

Qiu Yuan came in about an hour later. When she pushed open the door, she saw the young lady picking through the red plum blossoms one by one, carefully selecting and separating the ones with damaged petals.
Qiu Yuan lifted her skirt, knelt beside her, and helped her sort the blossoms.

The side chamber was quiet. After a long while, Qiu Yuan finally asked, “For His Majesty?”

The girl, at times, was very proper—unless she was absolutely certain that picking these red plums wouldn’t cause trouble, she wouldn’t have touched them at all.

Yun Si didn’t hide anything and nodded.

Qiu Yuan didn’t continue asking about the matter and instead said calmly,
“His Majesty is very angry. Eunuch Xu has already been scolded twice in the past hour.”

Yun Si rested her chin on one hand and said slowly and unhurriedly, “What does that have to do with me?”

Qiu Yuan glanced out through the lattice window, confirming the time.
“I think, if another quarter of an hour passes, Eunuch Xu will come looking for you.”

After all, the one who ties the bell must untie it. Eunuch Xu wasn’t foolish—he would surely come to her.

The selected red plum blossoms were all soaked in water. After being thoroughly rinsed, they were taken out again. The water was cold, freshly drawn from the well.
When the red plums were lifted out, Yun Si didn’t withdraw her hands but kept them submerged in the water.

Her hands were shivering from the cold, fingertips flushed red. Her lips had turned pale from the chill.
Even the rouge-colored crane cloak added no color to her face.

Qiu Yuan frowned as she watched, not stopping Yun Si, but couldn’t help saying, “You’ve just recovered, and now you’re going to make yourself sick again.”

Sometimes she found the girl quite contradictory—clearly she valued herself a great deal, yet when it came to treating herself, there was not a trace of mercy.

Qiu Yuan guessed right. A quarter of an hour later, the door to the side chamber was knocked from outside. Xu Shunfu appeared at the door, face drawn as if in mourning.

“Girl, please, be kind, help this servant, will you?”

Yun Si was, after all, a servant of Yangxin Hall. Since even Xu Shunfu had come to her, she naturally had no excuse to refuse. She glanced discreetly at the bronze mirror.

In the mirror, the woman’s complexion was pale, but her features were still delicate and beautiful. A lock of dark hair had fallen across her neck, half covered by the crane cloak, adding a touch of unintentional charm.
Only, the figure in the mirror was noticeably thin—fragile, almost to the point of looking breakable.

Persuaded by Xu Shunfu, she entered the hall to replace the tea. It was a simple task, and Yun Si did not refuse.

There was no one else in the hall.
Only Tan Yuanchu, hunched over his desk, handling state affairs. When he heard the door open, he frowned with some impatience, a trace of lingering cold anger still on his face.

Feeling slightly irritated, Tan Yuanchu looked up—and when he saw the woman, his brows furrowed deeper.

“Who told you to come?”

Yun Si ignored him and walked lightly up the steps. After replacing the tea on the imperial desk, she finally spoke, “Is it that Your Majesty no longer allows this servant to attend to you in the hall?”

Tan Yuanchu was left speechless by her words.

Yun Si turned and stepped down from the platform. Tan Yuanchu thought she was about to leave and his face darkened.

But she only took out some incense and added a bit to the burner where the previous stick had nearly burned out.
Wisps of pale smoke rose inside the hall, carrying a light scent of snow bamboo.
The fragrance was somewhat cold and distant, yet it had a calming effect, gently sweeping away the vague and indescribable restlessness in the air.

Since she had to work, she rolled up her sleeves slightly. Tan Yuanchu saw her fingertips.
Unlike the fair, delicate skin of her wrists, her fingertips were tinged red.

Her every movement was quiet and composed, but the heavy, stifling atmosphere in the hall gradually eased with her presence.
When Tan Yuanchu saw she was still busying herself, he suddenly said, “Are all the others dead? Does everything have to be done by you?”

Yun Si lowered her gaze and said nothing.

Tan Yuanchu couldn’t stand seeing her like this—as if she had suffered some great injustice. His tone sank.

“Come here.”

She didn’t move.

“Your Majesty is angry with this servant. This servant doesn’t dare come closer.”

Tan Yuanchu was choked by her reply. After a long moment, he softened his voice.

“Do you want me to come invite you?”

She finally moved, slowly shuffling over to him.

Tan Yuanchu was nearly amused by her attitude. Looking around at the scene in the hall—just who was really angry here?

He took her hand. As expected, it was icy cold, without the slightest warmth.
But Tan Yuanchu didn’t let go. Instead, he slowly warmed her hands, his voice still cold and firm.

“What are you upset about?”

Yun Si refused to admit it. “This servant is not upset.”

Tan Yuanchu didn’t believe her and asked again, “Are you upset that I accompanied her to admire the plum blossoms?”

She seemed annoyed by the question.
“You are the Emperor. It is proper for you to accompany the consorts of the harem.
If this servant were to be upset over something like that, then this servant would never have a single happy day.”

She was a bit temperamental. Tan Yuanchu pulled at the corner of his lips.

“So now you’re the one getting impatient.”

Yun Si pressed her lips tightly together and fell silent again.

Tan Yuanchu called her name coldly, “Yun Si.”

The floor heating was on in the hall, so it wasn’t cold at all—yet her hands remained cold no matter how he tried to warm them.
Suddenly, the woman before him turned her head away. She struggled to pull her hand back and wiped her face roughly.

That trace of anger in Tan Yuanchu’s heart instantly vanished upon seeing this.

He no longer asked what she was upset about, but pulled her into his arms, gently pressing his forehead to hers, and asked in a soft voice, “Are you cold?”

Yun Si didn’t even lift her head.
“Not cold.”

Tan Yuanchu wasn’t annoyed. He calmly said,

“I’m cold. Keep me company for a while.”

She finally couldn’t hold it in and glared at him with slight frustration.

There was a faint smile on Tan Yuanchu’s face. The two of them were very close, she was curled up entirely in his arms, almost as if they were brushing cheeks.
He asked her casually, “You didn’t want to see me, yet in the end you’re still angry at me, isn’t that unreasonable?”

At his question, the woman in his arms raised her almond-shaped eyes to look at him.
Those eyes held tears that sparkled faintly.

She said, “You clearly knew how difficult it was for this servant.
You also clearly knew that I didn’t truly want you to leave, but you still refused to show any understanding.”

Tan Yuanchu gently stroked her back, trying to soothe her emotions.

She resented that he wouldn’t try to understand her, yet refused to consider, when he heard that she only cared about her own situation and didn’t even come to see him, how could he possibly feel happy in his heart?

When she fell ill, he stayed by her side for so long. Though he didn’t remove his clothes and stay by her bed, he still worried that she might be afraid, and went to see her every single day.

If compared with the concubines in the harem, who had ever been personally cared for by him?

And yet she still said, “That day when you asked me for the sachet, I was afraid you’d think I didn’t care about you in my heart. As soon as I got better, I went to the plum grove to pick flowers. Who knew I would witness that scene, how do you expect me to be happy?”

“When I think about how, while I was sick, you were spending every day by someone else’s side, not caring about me at all, my heart just couldn’t be at peace, it felt like a jar of vinegar had spilled.”

“You say I’m being unreasonable, but I think no one argues as reasonably as you do.”

Who knows how long she had bottled up these words in her heart—she sobbed and choked on her words, but everything she said was coherent, each sentence full of grievance.

But Tan Yuanchu couldn’t even muster the slightest bit of anger. In fact, Tan Yuanchu didn’t like people crying—he always felt like it was a kind of coercion. Only with her—every time she cried, those apricot eyes tinged with red—he couldn’t do a thing about her.

He wiped the tear stains from her face, but she turned her head away, refusing to let him touch her. Tan Yuanchu could only lower his head and kiss her. Then he remembered what she had said earlier and softly asked, “Did you pick the plum blossoms for me?”

She sobbed as she raised her hand to wipe her tears, refusing to answer his question. Instead, she said,

“When Su Guipin secretly accused me of breaking the rules, all I could think about was—if you didn’t stand up for me, I’d never make anything for you again.”

Her threat carried no weight at all, yet at that moment, Tan Yuanchu’s heart softened. He nodded. “You picked them for me.”

All the sounds from the person in his arms came to an abrupt stop. She glared at him angrily with her almond-shaped eyes.
“I said so much, and that’s the only sentence Your Majesty heard?”

Tan Yuanchu didn’t deny it.
“You said a lot, I heard it all, but I liked that sentence the most.”

Yun Si thought she already had thick enough skin, but in front of Tan Yuanchu, she always ended up admitting defeat.

Tan Yuanchu suddenly thought of something and reached out to hold her hand.
“Why is your hand so cold?”

Yun Si complained.
“Doesn’t plum blossoms need to be washed?”

Tan Yuanchu was silent for a long time. Yun Si felt a bit suspicious. She lifted her eyes to look at him, only to crash into his somewhat darkened gaze. After a moment, he finally spoke, unhurriedly,
“These things—leave them to others to do in the future.”

She lifted her almond eyes, puzzled.
“Weren’t you the one who said I had to make the sachet for you by hand?”

Tan Yuanchu was speechless for a moment.
The food sent to him by the harem concubines—each and every one of them claimed it was handmade. Did she really believe those concubines personally made it?

As long as they so much as touched the stove, it was already considered hands-on.

But he didn’t explain all those twists and turns to her. He tucked the strands of hair damp with tears behind her ear and said lightly,
“Some steps can be left to others.”

Before the person in his arms could regret it, he suddenly asked, “Are you better now?”

Yun Si was taken aback.

Of course her illness had passed—the imperial physician had already said two days ago that she was recovered. It was just Qiu Yuan who wasn’t at ease and had her stay in bed a couple more days.

There was no way Tan Yuanchu didn’t know this—yet he still asked again.

Yun Si noticed a hand passing through the crane cloak and landing on her back, gently stroking down her spine. Yun Si couldn’t help but bite her lip, her body trembling slightly. Her slightly pale face seemed to have gained a bit of color at this moment. Yun Si’s voice trembled.

“It’s been fine for a long time…”

Someone untied her crane cloak, and the heavy cloak fell to the ground. No one spared a glance, neither Tan Yuanchu nor Yun Si.

She pursed her lips tightly, feeling that Tan Yuanchu was too good at bullying people.

Her legs were weak as she knelt on him, her whole body numb and itchy. She couldn’t help but sob. “You… can’t… do this…”

He didn’t listen to her at all. A button was undone, going down bit by bit. The restraints gradually disappeared, and finally vanished. Yun Si’s breathing was also about to stop.

The hot breath lingered above, and Yun Si’s body trembled slightly. She was at a loss and nervous, but could only sway like a boat on the waves.

A crack opened in the window, and a bit of cold wind crept in. Yun Si couldn’t help but look at the window. She was afraid, afraid of the wind, and also afraid of someone passing by, and then, being noticed by him. She was protected in his arms, shielded from the cold wind blowing.

He cherished her, but at certain times, he was particularly unfeeling.

He became more and more capable, more and more skilled than before, and he had more and more tricks.
He was a natural at it.

Yun Si bit her lip, still unable to control her intermittent sobs. Hot tears rolled down her eyes, and she reached out her arms to cover her eyes.

After a long time, or perhaps not very long.

The person sat up straight, wanting to lean over and kiss her. Yun Si remembered something, her body was still trembling, but she turned her head with difficulty.

Seeing her resistance, Tan Yuanchu faintly chuckled.

“I really don’t know if you dislike me, or if you dislike yourself.”

Yun Si disliked everyone, and also didn’t dislike anyone, just wanted to quickly cover his mouth.

As soon as she moved, her clothes slipped down, hanging on her fair arms, fragrant to the bone. The cold snow bamboo fragrance in the hall seemed to be tinged with a hint of charm. The person finally stopped taking further action. He stroked her cheek, brushed the wet hair behind her ears, and asked in a hoarse voice, “It will make you uncomfortable here, shall we go inside?”

The imperial desk was hard, pressing against her waist, making her feel pain if she resisted. Tan Yuanchu knew she didn’t like it, so he rarely did intimate things with her there.

Her undergarment was hung on her neck by a thin string, barely covering anything. Yun Si gathered her clothes, but couldn’t hide the marks and the hint of crimson.

She was ashamed, and the lingering tremors hadn’t subsided. Her voice was soft as she resisted.

“This servant… doesn’t want to…”

Tan Yuanchu picked her up, leaving his cloak on the ground. Hearing her, he asked her with an ambiguous tone, “Was that a bit too much?”

He carried her down the steps, and seeing her cheeks flushed red, he casually said, “I want to.”

Yun Si’s heart was racing. She raised her hand to cover her face. When Tan Yuanchu entered the inner hall, the six-panel screen blocked the view, removing the risk of being seen. She finally dared to lower her hand.

Before the view was completely blocked, Yun Si caught a glimpse of the bright outside through the window.

The outside was truly quiet, as if there was no one there at all.

He leaned down, kissing her with affection. Seeing her body tremble, he chuckled softly.

“Why are you more shy each time?”