I Want Her to See Only Me - Chapter 7

For lunch, Aunt Chen prepared pork braised in red wine sauce, chicken wings stuffed with mushrooms, and steamed cabbage leaves with garlic and Fensi. Keeping in mind that there was a child present, she also made steamed eggs with shrimp, and served ginger milk pudding for dessert. Finally, she brought out a bowl of vegetable soup to complete the meal.

Xia Yu had been bustling about the kitchen with Aunt Chen before lunch, eager to help. Xia Xiuyin didn’t dampen the girl’s enthusiasm, instead fetching a small stool and handing her some chopped green onion for her to sit and peel by the kitchen entrance.

By the time the meal was served, however, Xia Yu had gripped her chopsticks, frozen in her seat without daring to move, her earlier liveliness gone.

“What is it?” Xia Xiuyin asked, placing a piece of pork braised in red wine sauce into her wooden bowl. The fragrant dish, its rich sauce seeping into the steamed rice, was enticingly glossy.

The girl stared furtively at Xia Xiuyin’s hand, watching her short fingers adjust the angle of the chopsticks, too afraid to reach out and try herself.

Xia Xiuyin realized the reason behind Xia Yu’s shyness after only a few glances—the child didn’t know how to use chopsticks.

How many times had Xia Yu sat down properly to eat a meal before she turned eight? She was used to eating hard mantou bread and picking leftovers from other people’s plates. What trash needed proper bowls and chopsticks?

But she didn’t dare voice her thoughts.

Xia Yu’s lashes quivered as she despised her own clumsy hands, which refused to cooperate even with the simplest chopsticks.

She could feel her sister’s gaze on her, light yet unwavering, and the accompanying embarrassment made her cheeks burn. The anguish in her chest swelled until it spilled out the rims of her eyes. If only she were a little more clever, a little more likeable—then her sister would certainly favor her.

Xia Yu didn’t look up, so she never saw the joy in Xia Xiuyin’s eyes, born of Xia Yu’s clumsiness, her awkwardness, and her cautiousness. The household kept child-sized chopsticks, but Aunt Chen forgot, and Xia Yu didn’t remind her.

In the depths of her heart, that gentle, kind sister cruelly waited for Xia Yu to cry before tucking away her own joy, then gently saying, “Our A’Yu doesn’t know how to use chopsticks?”

Xia Yu flinched at this, the word “A’Yu” making her heart pound so violently it felt like it would burst through her chest.

Especially when her sister’s warm breath brushed against her ear.

As Xia Yu clearly heard her sister’s words, the color slowly drained from her face once again.

“Mm…” Xia Yu couldn’t hold back from whimpering. I’ve lost my dignity in front of Sister again.

“It’s all right.” A warm, delicate hand covered Xia Yu’s small back, and Xia Xiuyin’s scent drew near.

Xia Yu’s eyes widened. Amidst the pounding of her heart and the ringing in her ears, she heard her sister say, “I’ll teach you.”

Gently correcting Xia Yu’s posture, Xia Xiuyin wrapped an arm around the little girl and held her hand as she picked up a drumstick. “For A’Yu?”

Xia Yu shook her head imperceptibly; her heart was beating too fast, the reverberations in her chest intolerable, as if even her sister might hear them.

In Xia Xiuyin’s embrace, she could no longer think. Even if she did, she wouldn’t be able to offer a better response.

Unconsciously, she said, “For…Sister.”

Faintly, she seemed to hear a soft laugh from her sister, and her ears burned red.

Xia Yu was no foolish child; once she got the hang of the chopsticks, she bravely used them with ease. She wanted to spend more time with her sister, but she also feared that Xia Xiuyin would become impatient, so she thanked Xia Xiuyin as soon as she could manage to use the chopsticks on her own.

Then, she carefully picked up sweet and tender napa cabbage to feed Xia Xiuyin, but the garlic chives remained a challenge.

Xia Xiuyin waited patiently for her to eat, and Xia Yu’s heart felt warm, thinking, How kind my sister is.

When Aunt Chen finished lunch, she returned to see Xia Yu and Xia Xiuyin chewing on chicken wings with disposable gloves on their hands.

The little girl attentively picked out juicy and tender chicken wings for Xia Xiuyin, then shyly buried her own in her bowl once her sister accepted the offering, her bashful demeanor incredibly endearing.

Xia Xiuyin’s expression was relaxed, gaze fixed on the girl in front of her. Sometimes, she fed Xia Yu, whose face reddened as she ate from her sister’s hand, long lashes gently fluttering.

How wonderful, Aunt Chen sighed to herself.

Just then, the phone in the living room rang, and both the little one and the big one unconsciously glanced in the direction of the sound.

Aunt Chen picked up the phone.

“Hello, good evening.”

“Yes. May I ask what you’re calling about?”

“Xia Xiuyin… please hold.”

Aunt Chen covered the microphone with her hand and called for Xia Xiuyin, “Young lady, it’s the TV station.”

Xia Yu-minutely sensed the soft warmth emanating from Xia Xiuyin freeze momentarily, quickly followed by a hint of annoyance and distaste.

Xia Xiuyin took off her gloves, stood up, and reminded Xia Yu before leaving, “A’Yu, keep eating. It’ll go cold.”

She took the phone from Aunt Chen, her voice cool and distant, her expression unconcerned. “Hello, I’m Xia Xiuyin.”

“Mm-hmm.”

“Okay.”

Finally, she said, “I’ll cooperate.”

Glancing down at her watch, Xia Xiuyin turned around, meeting Xia Yu’s uneasy and worried gaze.

A softness filled her gaze once again, and she walked back into the dining room. Before Xia Yu, she leaned down and tucked the girl’s slightly long hair behind her ear.

“Sister will be out for a bit, but I’ll be back soon. Wait for me at home, alright?”

Xia Xiuyin patted Xia Yu’s head.

“Okay!” Xia Yu obediently answered, earning herself an even gentler pat.

Xia Xiuyin went upstairs, then came back down after changing into her school uniform. She walked toward the front door, and just as she was about to put on her shoes, she turned around and glanced at Xia Yu, who immediately raised her hand and waved vigorously, then waved some more.

“Sister, goodbye, goodbye,” she said in a small voice.

Xia Xiuyin wore the outfit she’d found in the trashcan; Xia Yu faintly understood that this attire, which she thought brought her luck, seemed to trouble Xia Xiuyin. She couldn’t help but shrink in unease.

Xia Xiuyin looked at her intently, as if she had just remembered something. She swiftly walked over to Xia Yu, momentarily startling the girl, and carefully placed a small hairpin among Xia Yu’s bangs.

Xia Xiuyin cupped Xia Yu’s face, looked at her, and said, satisfied, “This way, you won’t poke your eyes.”

She added, “A’Yu, goodbye.”

The door closed, and Xia Yu woke from her dreamlike state, feeling the hair clasp on her head. A longing, impractical and destined to entangle her for a lifetime, unfurled in her heart: she wanted to be with her sister forever.

After Xia Xiuyin left, Aunt Chen noticed Xia Yu wasn’t very enthusiastic about eating, so she offered her some dessert.

While Aunt Chen cleared the table, Xia Yu anxiously darted around, as if she wanted to help but was too short, and could only despondently stare at the edge of the table.

The longer Aunt Chen spent with Xia Yu, the more she adored this little girl. Well-behaved and considerate, quiet but attentive—a delight to converse with.

“Can you help Aunt Chen find the dishcloth?” Seeing how dejected Xia Yu appeared, Aunt Chen gave her a task. As expected, Xia Yu’s mood lifted, and she earnestly searched around the kitchen.

When she discovered the truth, she held the cloth in her hands until Aunt Chen placed the dishes into the dishwasher, then handed the cloth over to her.

After wiping down the counter, she turned to Xia Yu, who stood obediently in place, out of her way. “Thank you, sweetheart,” she said with a smile.

The little girl lowered her head and squeezed her fingers, also appearing quite pleased.

Aunt Chen’s workload was light, or perhaps it was more accurate to say that all the servants in the mansion enjoyed a rather comfortable work environment.

Fang Duan rarely returned to the mansion, and Xia Xiuyin was amiable, never imposing. All the staff needed to do was perform their duties properly, and working there was quite a pleasant experience.

Aunt Chen finished her round with Xia Yu still trailing behind her. She removed her apron and joked, “Our little sweetheart’s tummy is empty again?”

Xia Yu instinctively rubbed her stomach, then realized Aunt Chen was teasing her. She shook her head, her ears turning red.

“What’s wrong?” Aunt Chen asked, smiling.

“Sis… Sis.” Xia Yu pointed toward the entrance, confusion written in her eyes.

Aunt Chen knelt before Xia Yu, understanding suddenly dawning on her. “You want to ask why the mistress is going out?”

Xia Yu nodded eagerly.

Aunt Chen’s expression darkened as she heard this, anger bubbling within her. Once she came back to her senses and saw Xia Yu’s frightened gaze, she scolded herself for scaring the child.

“It’s all that no-good father’s fault…” Aunt Chen said, “The young lady was the top student in her city’s middle school exam a while back, but because she doesn’t like being in the spotlight, she politely declined all video interviews from the media. Who could’ve known… Who could’ve known that Mr. Fang wanted to use our young lady to bring attention to his company and asked her to help build an image of a successful businessman for him.”

“The young lady didn’t bother engaging with him, just like always. But when she came back from her graduation ceremony, we discovered that the Samoyed dog the family had raised for three years had fallen from the fourth floor and died.”

“The dog was normally quite timid, so it wouldn’t have dared to climb so high. It was also very smart and loved to play with people, so why would such a docile creature go to the open space on the fourth floor? The servants all knew what happened, but who would dare tell the young lady?”

“Of course, the young lady herself also knew. Mr. Fang then said that any future pets needed to be approved by him. The young lady and Mr. Fang had a huge argument in the study, and once she walked out, she agreed to the interview.”

Aunt Chen spoke quickly and incessantly, while Xia Yu listened in confusion.

“Miss waited for Mr. Fang until 4 a.m. this morning, finally receiving a promise that he would allow her to keep a pet, as long as she met his conditions.”

She smiled. “And then, quite conveniently, you were brought home.”

The cicadas chirped loudly in the sweltering summer heat. Xia Yu’s heart slowly sank, submerged in ice water, never to be lifted again.