Gloves - Chapter 30

“Yu’er, pause for a moment!” After completing the surgery, Shang Zhuoxi was attending to the patient’s leg wound while Xu Yuer was bandaging it.

Suddenly, the patient’s head began shaking from side to side, their expression filled with intense pain, as if they were trying to break free. The breathing tube that had just been removed was swiftly reattached.

“What’s happening?” Xu Yuer asked, and the air in the operating room instantly became tense.

“The blood oxygen saturation suddenly dropped. It could be… a pulmonary embolism,” Dr. Shang said, causing everyone to panic. A pulmonary embolism, with a 100% mortality rate!

“Pure oxygen, quickly!”

“Atropine 0.5 milligrams, vasopressin 1 milligram…”

…The air conditioning in the operating room was running at full blast, yet fine beads of sweat formed on everyone’s foreheads. Only Shang Zhuoxi remained calm as she continued to command:

“External cardiac compressions!” A doctor mechanically approached the patient, placing their hands on the patient’s chest and performing a compression. A hopeful waveform would appear on the monitor, but as soon as they stopped, everything returned to stillness…

Finally, the ECG showed a flat line. Blood pressure: 0/1. Heart rate: 0/1.

Xu Yuer let out a loud cry, and a young nurse was so frightened that she fell to the ground.

At this moment, Shang Zhuoxi’s surgical gown was soaked with sweat on the front and back. Beads of sweat gathered on her forehead, sliding down to her chin and hitting the ground. A major surgical accident had occurred, and the life of this elderly patient had ended on the operating table.

From the completion of the surgery until the end of the shift, the atmosphere in the entire department remained heavy. The patients’ family members were crying or causing a scene, and Shang Zhuoxi was constantly explaining…

“Zhuoxi, don’t blame yourself. It’s not your fault. We all saw it, and the patient’s family signed the risk agreement,” Shang Zhuoxi leaned back in her chair, supporting her forehead. A few strands of her golden hair were tangled and disheveled.

This was also the first time Xu Yuer had encountered such a situation. She walked over and embraced Shang Zhuoxi’s head, gently comforting her. Even the strongest queen needs a comforting embrace. Indeed, at this moment, Shang Zhuoxi just needed a hug. She quietly leaned against Xu Yuer’s soft and warm belly.

“Zhuoxi, you did your best. The leg bone surgery was actually a success, but…” Xu Yuer hugged Shang Zhuoxi tighter, not saying anything more.

“Yu’er, accompany me to visit my father.”

“Okay,” the once stubborn girl now became gentle and compliant.

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“Baby, I’m sorry, I can’t make it. I left the roses on the roadside. There’s an emergency surgery at the hospital…” The man on the phone hurriedly passed by An Chujie, hailed a taxi, and left.

Not far ahead, there was a woman’s figure.

“You get lost! If you don’t come today, don’t ever expect to see me again!” The woman cried hysterically into the phone. Wiping her tears, she walked towards An Chujie, grabbed the fresh bouquet of roses from the ground, and unceremoniously threw them into the trash bin. The vibrant red flowers squeezed against the gray bin, as if each petal refused to go in. A droplet of water dripped from the exquisite petals, like tears streaming down a woman’s face. She crouched on the ground, holding herself as she sobbed. Then, she took out her phone and dialed a number, continuing to complain to the person on the other end:

“I never want to date a doctor again in my life. What’s the difference between dating them and being in a long-distance relationship? This isn’t the first time…”

Presumably, the person on the other end was her best friend. An Chujie looked at her sorrowful state, feeling a pang of discomfort in her heart. She couldn’t help but reflect on her own experiences.

Her relationship with Shang Zhuoxi went from seeing each other three times a week to once a week, and then to twice a month. In the past two months, they hadn’t even met due to An Chujie’s out-of-town commitments.

The first thing An Chujie did upon returning was to call Shang Zhuoxi.

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It was a rare occasion that Qi Ruan wasn’t with her today. An Chujie had bought plenty of fresh food, intending to cook something delicious for Shang Zhuoxi. She thought about her almost every day.

Carrying bags of groceries, An Chujie arrived home and noticed that Shang Zhuoxi’s car was already parked there. The slanting rays of the setting sun cast long shadows of everything. She walked over joyfully, but suddenly the car next to her started shaking. Before long, she heard muffled sounds of someone pounding on the windows from inside.

There was a face pressed against the car window, eyes closed, displaying a mixture of pain and pleasure. The sunset’s glow wasn’t that harsh, right? The woman inside the car exhaled white fog onto the glass, her left hand seemingly held from behind, pressed against the glass. Her other hand was frantically pounding on the window, attempting to grab onto something. And behind her was a woman with long hair, biting her ear. The woman with long hair had her eyes closed and her hair fell to one side. It was her that caused the woman in the car to have such an expression. The two of them were engrossed in their passionate encounter, completely unaware of the person standing outside.

An Chujie stood frozen in place, unable to move. She instinctively held her breath. After clearly seeing the face pressed against the window, her heart seemed to pause for a second. Her hand went limp, and the things in her hands fell to the ground. She quickly crouched down to pick up the bags. The car stopped shaking, and two seconds later, it started moving again. The white fog on the car window had already spread to the point where she couldn’t see inside.

An Chujie hurriedly clutched the things in her hands and lowered her head, quickly walking towards her home. Leaning against the door, she took deep breaths. If her heart could jump out, it would have fallen to the ground by now. But her chest felt as if something enormous was blocking it, preventing her heart from escaping. Her nose tingled with a painful sensation, and her vision quickly became blurry. An Chujie fumbled for her keys, unable to find the right one for a while. In the end, she didn’t even know how she managed to open the door.

An Chujie absentmindedly threw the vegetables into the kitchen and turned to see the car outside still shaking. Her soul felt as if it was floating, and she suddenly realized that she couldn’t even cry at this moment.

She silently stared at the car, waiting for it to stop, waiting for the blonde woman to emerge from the backseat, sweat dripping from her forehead, greedily inhaling the fresh air. She still wore pristine white gloves and carried the “used” ones outside to throw them into the dirty trash can before getting back in the car and driving away.

An Chujie didn’t have time to think about why they were doing this at her doorstep. The heart-wrenching feeling was enough to numb her nerves.

The pathways of her thoughts were blocked, unable to flow in their usual direction. They started to flow in reverse.

An Chujie took a deep breath, telling herself that she didn’t have to be so afraid, so tormented. It was just the burning sensation in her eyes that made her uncomfortable.

Her phone lit up with a message notification:

“Darling, I’m done with work. Are you home?”

An Chujie picked up the phone, her trembling fingers tapping on the screen as she replied:

“Yes, come over. I’ll make you a delicious dinner.” (Smiling face)

Setting down the phone, An Chujie began busying herself in the kitchen. She wanted to make the most delicious dinner for Shang Zhuoxi.

As soon as Shang Zhuoxi entered the door, she was greeted by an intoxicating aroma. Her salivary glands and stomach acids started to react and secrete. An Chujie walked out with her usual smile, or rather, today she seemed to be smiling even more brightly. An Chujie played the role of a virtuous wife, taking Shang Zhuoxi’s bag and placing it away. She embraced Shang Zhuoxi, expressing her longing, and lovingly caressed Shang Zhuoxi’s face, considerately saying:

“You must be tired after a long day. You must be hungry.”

“Mmm,” Shang Zhuoxi kissed An Chujie’s cheek and nodded eagerly. “Baby, how are you so capable? I love you so much.” Today, Shang Zhuoxi’s words were especially sweet, and her appetite was particularly good. She looked like a child with her mouth stuffed, cheeks puffed out.

An Chujie massaged Shang Zhuoxi’s shoulders and neck, taking longer than usual. She hand-washed Shang Zhuoxi’s high-end custom clothes that couldn’t be tossed in the washing machine, being even more focused and meticulous than before. She trembled with effort, eagerly fulfilling every deep desire of Shang Zhuoxi, feeling sexier and more enticing than ever…

This would be the last time she did all these things for Shang Zhuoxi because she had finally made up her mind to leave her.

The next day, when Shang Zhuoxi woke up, there was only a table full of breakfast and a piece of white paper left in the house:

【Zhuoxi, until now, I preferred to deceive myself into believing that you loved me. Since you do love me, I hope you will let me go and find my own happiness. Loving you is worth it, but I think, and I have to stop now, my dear, do you know? In this relationship…】

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【In this relationship, we were like a nut and a screw, and I was that lonely screw. From the moment I first saw you, that nut, I wanted to become the unique screw that could tightly fit into your life. So I slowly approached you, cautiously stepping into your world,】 An Chujie wiped away her tears while gripping the pen tightly.

【But then I realized that we weren’t as compatible as I thought, because you were more outstanding and sturdy than me. In order to prevent my own threads from hurting you, I started to polish myself, smoothing out the parts that made us incompatible, so that I could be with you.】 An Chujie covered her mouth, sobbing as she crumpled tissue after tissue, wetting them with her tears before tossing them into the trash can. Memories of happy moments flashed through her mind like a movie, the scenes changing too quickly, making her feel dizzy.

【However, as time went on, I started to rust in the places you couldn’t reach. The rust spread, and the friction between us increased. So our connection began to falter again. My dear, it’s not your fault; the fault lies with me for overestimating myself and wanting to enter your world. So let me bear the consequences. And once again, I started tirelessly erasing my own threads until they were smooth and shiny,】 An Chujie wrote until this point, then collapsed onto the table, hiding in her own arms and crying uncontrollably. Her sobs were muffled, and a stray tear accidentally fell onto the white paper. An Chujie panicked and quickly wiped it away with her hand.

【I happily and foolishly believed that this way, there would be no more friction between us, and I would no longer have small teeth that could scratch you. But now I realize that this bare screw of mine has already lost the most fundamental condition for joining with you. We no longer need each other. I won’t be here anymore. Will you, the high-quality and sturdy nut, feel a sense of emptiness and panic for a while? Forgive me for not having enough time to be with you or to continue taking care of you. Don’t be afraid. I believe there will be many screws much more suitable for you than me. They will accompany you, share your joy, and bear your sorrows. I will transfer all the money I owe you to your account by noon. Thank you, Shang Zhuoxi. – An.】

Thank you for allowing me to experience the taste of being loved. Thank you for letting me taste the happiness of dedicating myself to someone. Thank you for providing me with material security in my most difficult times… It’s just that I’m too tired.

The sea before dawn was almost merged with the sky in a chaotic blend. The sea breeze at this moment made An Chujie feel a bone-chilling cold. The sea water splashed onto An Chujie’s face, washing away her tears. Saying thank you was her way of not wanting Shang Zhuoxi to feel guilty. This was An Chujie’s last act of tenderness.