Everyone Wants To Harm Me - Chapter 87

At first, I thought it was just a fire in the camp. I hurriedly got up, put on my clothes, and went outside, only to see that the fire had spread to the mountain.

The dead branches and leaves from last year were dry and brittle, crackling as they burned. When the east wind blew, the fire spread rapidly. Sparks fell into the camp, igniting the dry grass and tents.

Someone tried to put out the fire with a basin of water, but was stopped by another: “The mountain is on fire! What good is this little water? We need to run!”

Several people put out the fire on the tent and helped those inside escape. Thick smoke surged ahead of the mountain fire, causing panic in the camp. People ran about in chaos.

My tent was next to Princess Yongjia’s, and I rushed over to see that she had been rescued. The officials’ tents were outside the foot of the mountain, so they should have been able to retreat more easily. I also trusted Yu Chongrui’s skills and adaptability.

Then I thought of the Third Prince. He was near the imperial carriage on higher ground, and the child was sound asleep. I didn’t know if anyone was looking after him.

When I reached the imperial carriage, I didn’t find the Third Prince but encountered the Emperor. That night, Concubine Shu had accompanied him. Both had just woken up, their clothes disheveled, and were being helped out of the camp by several eunuchs. In that frantic moment, the Emperor’s minor stroke symptoms returned—he limped heavily and struggled to run.

Liang Lu led two horses over, coughing as he said to the Emperor, “The fire is spreading too fast. Your Majesty, please mount a horse and go to a safe place first—your wellbeing comes first!”

He helped the Emperor onto the horse.

The eunuch on the other side tried to assist Concubine Shu, but the Emperor turned and shouted, “Give that horse to Princess Liangxi!”

Concubine Shu stood there in disbelief, her face pale.

Liang Lu quickly handed me the reins of the other horse. “Please escort the Emperor first, Princess Liangxi. There’s a stream valley three miles southeast. Once you reach the water, it will be safe. I will protect Concubine Shu and follow her out of the camp.”

I had no time to explain to Concubine Shu. I mounted the horse and followed the Emperor out of the camp.

The horses galloped fast. At first, we could see a few people running around us, but gradually, the sounds of human voices faded. The cold wind in the middle of the February night felt like a knife against my face, but behind us, a raging forest fire burned. The entire mountain was aflame, and the heat and thick smoke reached several miles away.

The fire behind us made the road ahead seem even darker, and I couldn’t see a single star in the sky. I had to follow the sound of the Emperor’s horse hooves and kept moving forward.

After running for about half a mile, I believed we had already passed three miles, but I still hadn’t seen the valley Liang Lu mentioned. I raised my voice and asked, “Your Majesty, are we going in the wrong direction?”

The wind howled, and the horses continued galloping. I wasn’t sure if he had heard me.

After galloping a few more miles, the fire was left far behind, like a massive bonfire on the horizon. I turned back to look but saw nothing but vast darkness ahead. I could only rely on the tilt of the horse’s body to tell that we were going uphill. Occasionally, a branch scraped my arm, and the surroundings seemed to be a dense forest.

I didn’t dare move too quickly and pulled back the reins. Suddenly, the Emperor’s horse in front of me let out a long whinny, followed by the sound of hooves stumbling, people and horses falling, and rolling.

I quickly dismounted and rushed toward the sound, calling out, “Your Majesty? Your Majesty!”

There was no answer, only the sound of the horse’s frantic neighs and low moans.

My eyes began to adjust to the dim light, and I could barely make out the shadows of trees and the road. I stumbled through the forest, stepping on stones and dead branches, making my way toward the Emperor’s horse. The horse seemed to have sprained its leg and had collapsed on the ground, but the Emperor was nowhere to be seen.

I called out to the left and right: “Your Majesty! Where are you? Your Majesty!”

After a long while, I heard a weak, intermittent voice from the lower left: “I… am here…”

Suddenly, a flash of lightning broke through the night sky, illuminating the dark forest. Thunder followed, as if hanging above my head. The injured horse, frightened by the lightning, struggled to stand, neighing loudly, and then bolted madly into the depths of the forest, disappearing instantly.

By the lightning’s glow, I saw the Emperor in a white robe, lying face down at the bottom of a slope. His body was very visible against the dark night.

I approached cautiously, almost stepping off the edge myself. The ground was loose, and gravel and dead leaves crumbled beneath my feet. I had to maneuver around from the side, holding onto a tree trunk, exploring my path step by step, until I finally made it to the bottom of the slope.

After the first thunder and lightning, more thunder clapped in the distance, one after another.

The Emperor had fallen sideways. At the bottom of the slope was a towering old tree, its exposed and tangled roots caught around the Emperor’s neck. His posture was unnatural, and from a distance, it seemed as though he had no head. When I got closer, I realized his neck had twisted at an odd angle, resting against his chest.

I tried to approach to help, but as soon as I raised my hand, he stopped me.

“Don’t move,” he said with great difficulty, his words slurred. “I… fell… on my neck.”

I froze, my hand hovering just inches above his neck. I didn’t dare to act rashly. The neck is one of the most vulnerable parts of the body.

Could it be that he had broken it? I had heard of a nobleman’s son dying after a similar accident, unable to be saved when the rescuer moved him wrongly.

I stared at my hand raised in the air, and at the Emperor’s twisted body beneath me. Suddenly, a bold idea crossed my mind.

What if… what if I just lowered my hand, didn’t do anything violent, just gave him a gentle shake? Would he… never be able to control me again? Could I be freed from his power? The injustice of my aunt’s forced suicide could be avenged…

The lightning flashed again, and the blue-white light illuminated the area. The Emperor’s face was buried in his elbow, revealing only his eyes, which were eerily moving, as if he were holding his head in his arms.

The eyes suddenly turned, staring at me through the gap between his elbow and the tree root. His voice came harshly: “What do you want to do?!”

I was startled and immediately pulled my hand back.

Had I just thought of killing him?

He was not just any man. He was the Emperor, the supreme ruler of the land. Regicide was an unforgivable crime. It was a crime that would result in the execution of my entire family.

He was also my aunt’s husband—the one she had loved, followed, and supported her whole life. Even when their relationship fell apart, she chose to end her own life rather than betray or abandon him.

Aunt, if you are still watching, would you want me to avenge you? Or should I let him go?

I slowly lowered my hand and took two steps back.

I had no right to take another’s life, no matter how much harm he had caused me or my loved ones. But I could not forget the wrongs he had done, and I could not forgive him.

The Emperor’s eyes turned to the empty space beside him as he weakly ordered, “Go… call for help…”

I stepped back and turned to flee in the opposite direction of the deep forest.

Since I couldn’t decide, I let fate decide for me.

I didn’t know how long I ran, or how far I had gotten from the Emperor’s fall. All I knew was that the trees around me seemed to grow denser, and the distant fire on Cone Mountain had turned into fragmented light and shadow through the forest’s dense trunks and branches.

The ground was uneven, the dead leaves soft and deep underfoot. I ran hard, and my horse, hearing the noise, trotted to catch up. I whipped it sharply, and it ran off in pain. But soon it circled back and followed me at a distance.

What was the point of following me? I was doing something that defied heaven’s will, and I knew it would cost me my life.

As I thought this, I felt something biting at my left foot. I couldn’t stop in time and fell to the ground, feeling a sharp pain in my ankle.

I climbed up from the dead leaves, and when I moved my left foot, I heard the clanking of iron. I touched my calf and felt two arc-shaped iron hoops, rust-covered and cold to the touch.

I had stepped into a trap left in the forest. The iron teeth bit down on my ankle, digging into my flesh. I tried to pry the trap open, but its grip was too strong. It wouldn’t budge at all. The other end was tethered to the ground by an iron chain and a wooden stake.

I knew that doing bad things would bring retribution, but I didn’t expect it to come so quickly.

Though the scene was unclear in the dark, I could feel the blood flowing from my wound, trickling down my ankle like a crawling worm. Soon, the inside of my shoes was soaked.

What would be a minor injury for an ordinary person was fatal to me. When dawn broke and someone found this spot, my blood would likely have dried up by then.

I shuffled back to a tree, leaning against its trunk, and tried to gather my bearings. I had hastily thrown on an outer coat over my middle clothes when I rushed out earlier. Now, I could feel the bone-chilling cold of the February night.

The horse came back again. After I had whipped it, it dared not approach, lingering three or four feet away instead. I tried to coax it closer, hoping to tie the iron chain to it and use its strength to lift the wooden stake. But no matter how I whistled or called, it refused to come any closer.

It was a good horse raised by the Emperor. Perhaps it had come back only to witness the consequences of my own actions on behalf of its master.

I bled more than I realized, and my strength was draining. I felt cold and drowsy.

As I leaned against the tree, half asleep and half awake, cold water began to drip onto my face, rousing me.

Spring thunder cracked in the distance, and the first rain of the year finally fell.

The rain came down harder, hitting the dead leaves with a soft rustling sound. The fierce fire on Cone Mountain also began to subside, the rain extinguishing the flames and reducing the fire’s intensity.

I couldn’t help but think that perhaps God was still watching over me. This timely rain had doused the fire and saved the spring farming season in Luoyang.

So, I had done a bad thing, failed to save the dying, and made everything worse. Now, God would make me pay for my actions—one life for another.

It felt fair. There was nothing to resent or be angry about, though I felt a hint of regret.

I regretted that Yu Chongrui seemed to have developed feelings for me, but I had no time to hear him say so himself.

In my dazed state, I thought I might be hallucinating. I seemed to be transported back to that night I fled from Fan Zeng’s house. A dense rain, just like tonight, blurred my vision. I fell to the ground, only to see Yu Chongrui walking toward me with an umbrella and a lantern in his hand.

That was the only light in the darkness, the beacon that guided and saved me when I was on the verge of despair and wanted to give up.

He had walked up to me, tilted the umbrella toward me, and asked with a smile, “Why are you… Where are your medicines?”

No, that wasn’t what he had said, nor should it have been said in such a trembling, panicked tone. He had been laughing at me.

The sharp pain in my ankle brought me back to reality. I opened my eyes and saw a figure squatting in front of me.

The forest was dark, and I could only make out a vague outline. But without a doubt, I knew it was Yu Chongrui.

He was the only one who would come to save me. No matter where I was, he could always find me.

Without an umbrella or lantern, he was soaked by the rain. Kneeling on the ground, he worked to break the trap open with his bare hands.

“Where are your medicines?” he asked again, his voice urgent. “Why don’t you have them with you?”

I had them in the pocket of another coat. The fire broke out so suddenly, and I was in such a hurry, I didn’t have time to bring them.

He pried the trap off my leg and tossed it aside. Shielding himself from the rain, he tore off a piece of his shirt to wipe the blood from my wound. Then, he pulled something out of his pocket.

I recognized the familiar scent of medicine—it was Deng Zishe’s secret recipe, the only one of its kind in the world.

Why… did you carry it, when most people would never need it?

After applying the medicine and bandaging my wound, he took off his coat and wrapped it around me. He lifted me up, carrying me out of the forest.

I had no strength left. My head rested on his shoulder. God had been kind to me, letting me see him again at the last moment. I had no regrets.

“Zishe is in Tao Pavilion,” he whispered in my ear, his voice trembling. “I’ll take you to him now. He can save you. Don’t fall asleep!”

Tao Pavilion… Rui Garden… It was only a few dozen miles from here. Perhaps I could hold on for a little while longer.

I forced myself to speak, my voice weak. “Yu Chongrui, I did a terrible thing.”

He didn’t ask what the bad thing was, only said, “Do you regret it?”

I wanted to shake my head, but I couldn’t summon the strength. “No.”

“Then keep moving forward.”

I didn’t regret it. If I could turn back time and do it again, I would make the same choice.

I was just a little scared, afraid that God might be too cruel, demanding payment for my wrongs immediately, with my life for a life.

Before that happened, I had to say the words that had been buried in my heart for so long.

“Yu Chongrui,” I whispered in his ear, “do you… like me too?”