Everyone Wants To Harm Me - Chapter 59

Zhenniang was finally relieved and had fallen asleep peacefully. Judging from her appearance, she hadn’t had a good night’s rest in a long time.

I gently closed the door of the guesthouse and returned to the courtyard. It was past noon, and Yu Chongrui and Yan Shaoqing were still planning to head to the Yellow River.

“Can we leave a few Jinwu Guards to watch the garden?” I asked them. But thinking about the dangers there and their need for manpower, I changed my mind. “Just leave two to guard the gate. As long as the guards had armor and weapons, the servants next door wouldn’t dare to cause trouble.”

“Don’t worry, Miss He,” Yan Shaoqing said. “When I took the provincial examination, I met Master Nie once. He had suggested I switch from Mingjing Jinshi to Mingfa instead, which led me to my current position. I will take good care of his sister.”

(Translator’s Notes: Mingjing (明经) – Refers to scholars who specialized in the study of Confucian classics, focusing on moral teachings, ideological understanding, and traditional values.)

(Translator’s Notes: Mingfa (明法) – Literally meaning “clear in law,” this refers to the field of legal studies and expertise in governance through judicial principles.)

“We’ve discussed it,” he continued. “Tao Garden is too close to your family’s villa, and with so few people here, it’s not very safe. I have a private residence in Yongtong Ward that no one knows about. I’ll quietly take Lady Nie there to rest and recover, and once she’s better, I’ll arrange for her to be escorted back to Piling.”

Yan Shaoqing’s private house shouldn’t have been discovered by my family for a while, and no one in Luoyang would openly break in to rob people. Feeling reassured, I then remembered the river works.

“So, are you still going to the riverbank site with… with Minister Yu this afternoon?” I asked.

“It’ll take some time to go back and forth,” Yan Shaoqing said. “He’ll go first, and I’ll join him later.”

“Don’t worry,” Yu Chongrui added softly. “With the Jinwu Guards protecting me, there won’t be any danger.”

What was there to worry about? I wasn’t concerned about him… I was worried about Zhenniang.

“I’ll prepare the carriage and leave through the west to avoid Lan Garden,” Yan Shaoqing said.

“I’ll go back to the city with you,” I said, but after thinking it over, I changed my mind. “Forget it, let’s go separately. Zhenniang’s safety is more important. I don’t want to risk exposing your whereabouts.”

Yan Shaoqing left first, leaving only Yu Chongrui and me behind.

The sky was gloomy, hinting at rain.

“You…” he spoke first. “Do you want to go back?”

“Of course I have to go back. Ningning’s whereabouts could only be learned from my family.” I turned my face away from him. “Besides, where else could I go if not home? That’s my family.”

I had been born into such a family — I had no choice. But even if I could choose, I wouldn’t have wanted to stop being my parents’ daughter or my aunt’s niece.

There were still good people in my family — my grandmother, the late Madam Zhou, Brother Zhongshu, Zhenniang, and Ningning — as well as my future cousins and nieces. I couldn’t let things continue like this.

“I’m wondering now,” he said slowly, word by word, as if carefully weighing his thoughts, “if I should have let you go back last time.”

“If I hadn’t gone back, I wouldn’t have known about Zhenniang. I might not have even realized she was being tortured to death just across the wall from me.” I turned to look in the direction of Lan Garden. “My only regret is not going home sooner. I shouldn’t have run away.”

If I hadn’t fled from Lan Garden, I could have stayed with Zhenniang and Ningning, and my second uncle’s family wouldn’t have been able to target them so easily. If I hadn’t left, I wouldn’t have met Yu Chongrui, and everything that followed wouldn’t have happened.

Back then, I had only a vague fondness for him — nothing deep enough to make me miserable. If he hadn’t liked me, I would’ve felt a little regretful, but that would’ve been it.

I remembered how coldly he had rejected me and my brother Zhongshu, and in frustration, I lowered my head and pulled out all the gold leaves from my pouch. “I spent quite a bit on medical fees at your house last time. This gold should cover it. I’m returning it now.”

He looked at the gold leaves in my hand but didn’t reach for them.

“You don’t have to pay me back,” he said.

“I don’t like owing people.” Since he wouldn’t take it, I slapped the gold down on the table. “This is all I brought today. Zhenniang… I just wanted to borrow a path through your house, but I didn’t expect to run into you. Since you know her brother, consider this favor as one owed to her brother!”

But instead of feeling satisfied, I just felt even sadder.

I should have left with Yan Shaoqing. I shouldn’t have been alone with Yu Chongrui right then. I didn’t even have the courage to turn and look at him.

I turned my back to him, fearing that if I stayed any longer, my tears would spill over. I walked quickly toward the front gate.

“I’m leaving,” I said.

He followed me. “If you go back now, will your family give you trouble?”

“No. My grandfather loves me most, and my second uncle has to listen to him.”

In truth, I wasn’t sure. Even though it was the midwife and my aunt who hurt Ningning, my grandfather was the one who had encouraged and allowed it. Fourth Cousin’s marriage to the princess was all for the family’s honor, and even Lady Madam Zhou and Second Madam had been scolded by Grandfather for minor conflicts.

I would never regret saving Zhenniang, even if my grandfather scolded me when I returned.

Yu Chongrui said, “Or… you could stay at my house for a while.”

“What would I be in your house?” I snapped. “Besides, my grandfather already came once. If he comes again, can you really stop him?” I quickened my pace in frustration. “I can handle my own affairs. I don’t need anyone else meddling.”

He said nothing more and quietly followed me out of Rui Garden’s gate.

I looked up at the plaque above the door, with its meaningless “Tao Garden” inscription. The sight only added to my anger and sadness.

Chang San had driven the carriage and waited at the door. He was startled when he saw me.

“Miss Qi Yao?”

Yu Chongrui stepped forward. “I’ll take you back.”

“I don’t want you to take me back.” The carriage was too small; if we sat across from each other the whole way, I wouldn’t have been able to stop myself from breaking down. “Just let Brother Chang San take me.”

Chang San furrowed his dark brows. You two are quarreling — what does this have to do with me?

Yu Chongrui still insisted, sending me off with a reminder: “If Lord He presses the matter, blame it all on me. He knows Lady Nie is with me, so he may hesitate. Also, if anything happens that you can’t handle, come to Jixian Square or Tao Garden to find me.”

“I won’t go to you again.” I still remembered the pain from our last encounter.

I slammed the carriage door shut, sealing out the face that had brought me so much turmoil. Tears welled up and flowed freely.

I had already given up — why did he keep doing this, saying things that left me clinging to false hopes? If he treated me well, I might waver again, and if I fell deeper, I’d never be at peace.

Outside the carriage, I heard Yu Chongrui say to Chang San, “Drive slowly and steadily.”

I sat silently in the carriage, letting my tears fall.

By the time we reached the foot of Luoyang City, I had wiped my face dry. I asked Brother Chang San to let me off at Anxi Gate so I could walk back to Shanglin Square on my own.

I hadn’t entered the Duke’s Mansion through the main gate but slipped quietly through the west side door.

As soon as I stepped inside, I saw a little maid sneaking away from the corner of the wall. When she saw me, she ran off.

Forget it. Whoever’s servant she was didn’t matter.

I had known my family would find out soon enough about how I had caused a commotion at Lan Garden and taken Zhenniang away. It had been inevitable.

But I hadn’t expected the news to spread so quickly.

Just as I reached the gate of my courtyard, intending to change my clothes, Luoxiang appeared.

“Miss, you’re finally back. The Duke and Madam are looking for you.”

Grandfather had given up his official duties and only needed to check in at court briefly each day. His Majesty even allowed him to take leave whenever he wished.

I told Luoxiang, “Wait a moment. I’ll change my clothes and then go see Grandfather.”

Luoxiang replied, “I can wait, but the Duke might not. Aunt Zhao is already being flogged in Madam’s courtyard. If we delay any longer, they might beat another person to death.”

I stopped in my tracks, then turned to her. “Let’s go.”

Luoxiang followed me anxiously. I only wanted her to cause trouble at the second master’s house, but she went straight to Lan Garden! How did she know where that crazy woman was hiding? And now she’s lost her! If this gets out, the Duke and the lady will definitely think I told her. What should I do? How can I stop her from blaming me?

“You told me all this, so I know you’re well-informed. I’ll be relying on you a lot in the future,” I said. I reassured her, “Luoxiang, don’t worry. Today you told me about Zhenniang’s affairs, and I won’t betray you. In this household, it’s best if we all look out for one another. You take care of me, and I’ll take care of you.”

Luoxiang forced a dry laugh. “Miss, what are you saying? Only the master looks after the servants, not the other way around.” She lowered her voice, “The Duke is really angry this time. Miss, don’t provoke him again. Don’t think you can get away with everything just because you’re the Duke’s precious jewel.”

I knew I wasn’t some jewel in his hand — just a fish that had slipped through the net.

I followed Luoxiang to Madam Zhou’s courtyard, where I could hear Zhao Ersao and others crying for mercy from a distance. Madam Zhou was sitting with my grandfather in the hall. I ordered the servants who were beating them to stop, then walked inside and knelt before my grandfather.

“It was all my idea,” I said firmly. “The servants were just following orders. Even if you beat them to death, you won’t get anything useful out of them — it would just add more lives lost in vain. Please, Duke, stop.”

My grandfather sat in the upper seat, puffing on his water pipe. The swirling smoke blurred his face.

“After being away for a few days, you’ve learned to be sharp-tongued and use double meanings to mock your grandfather?” he said, narrowing his eyes and blowing out smoke rings. “Then tell me — where did that crazy woman from the Nie family go?”

“Zhenniang isn’t a crazy woman,” I replied while still kneeling. “She was rescued by relatives of the Nie family.”

“Nonsense! The Nie family is in Suzhou — how could they have relatives here in Luoyang?” My grandfather scowled, adding silently in his mind: If not, how could she have entered my He family?

Yes, the daughters-in-law of the He family were always either weak and easily controlled, or their families were too far away to interfere. Otherwise, how could so many women have died in this house without anyone finding out until now?

“I don’t know where the relatives came from,” I said. “All I know is they claimed to be acting in Nie Yun’s name.”

That name made my grandfather frown. He took another puff from his pipe and asked, “You couldn’t have managed this on your own in such a short time. Was it Yu Yan behind this?”

Yu Chongrui had asked me to blame him, but I had refused. I insisted, “She was rescued by the Nie family. Grandfather, you should think about how to explain this to your in-laws.”

“You think I don’t know what you’ve been up to with Yu Yan?” Grandfather slammed his hookah on the table and marched toward me. He grabbed my clothes and shook me. “Where did you get this dress? It’s the same one you wore at his house that day — a lowly servant’s attire! You could have been a good lady from a noble family, yet you chose to become some man’s servant! It’s disgraceful…”

He didn’t finish the thought: The daughter of a lowly maid can never rid herself of lowly blood. How could Qin’er be bewitched by a lowly maid, leaving behind only a posthumous child without a son!

Was the love between my parents — a love that had transcended life and death — really so disgraceful in his eyes?

I raised my head and asked, “Grandfather, when you say a ‘proper noble lady,’ do you mean like Father’s elder sisters, or the daughters born to the late Madam Zhou, or my little niece from Fourth Cousin’s household?”

Slap!

Grandfather’s hand struck my face.

He had never hit me before. Aside from that one time I had witnessed Yunxiang’s vicious thoughts, no one had ever slapped me like this.

My head tilted from the force, and my face burned with pain.

I wished this had been just a terrible illusion — something only in Grandfather’s mind. No matter how harshly he thought of me or how vicious his words were, if he didn’t act on them, I could still believe he was a loving grandfather and a respected prime minister.

But now he’d shattered that last hope.

Grandfather’s hands and feet trembled with rage. Madam Zhou hurried over to help him back to his seat and soothed him. “Don’t be angry, Duke. It’s not worth ruining your health over a young person’s foolishness.”

Grandfather pointed a finger at me. “What good is raising daughters? Years of nurturing can’t compare to a few sweet words from an outsider! They’re all ungrateful water spilled out for others to benefit! Now she’s even siding with outsiders against her own family — isn’t that just ruining our He family’s fortune? It would have been better to drown her in a water tank long ago!”

Madam Zhou patted his back and signaled to me. I knelt straight on the floor and said, “Grandfather, you say daughters are useless and bring bad luck — that they should be drowned. Then why did you accept the wealth and status that Aunt brought to this family? I never heard you complain then that Aunt was destroying the feng shui and bringing bad luck.”

“She didn’t bring bad luck?” Grandfather spat. “Isn’t our family cursed now? She was a concubine who couldn’t behave, fooling around with some lowly eunuch! Then she had the audacity to commit suicide for love! She’s just another lowly woman — her lowliness was in her very bones! If it weren’t for His Majesty’s kindness, our entire family would have been doomed. I’m going to die because of her!”

Tears welled up in my eyes as I asked, “If it weren’t for Aunt, how would Grandfather have become the Duke of the country?”

“How?” His face twisted. “That was the result of my family’s ancestors accumulating virtue for six generations! Wei Lan only offered that fortune to His Majesty, helping him escape disaster — that’s my He family’s merit! All the glory and wealth we enjoy now are what my family rightfully deserves!”

So that’s what he believed. People capable of sacrificing girls for good fortune clearly thought differently than I did. There was no reasoning with him.

I lowered my head and kept silent.

After Madam Zhou calmed him for a while, my grandfather finally cooled down and asked, “Is Nie in Yu Yan’s hands? What does he want?”

I kept my head down and said nothing.

“Fine!” he snapped. “You won’t talk? Since you helped her escape, you’ll be locked up in her place! Let’s see if those outsiders you trust so much will come to save you!” Grandfather shouted, “Take her away! Seal the courtyard gate, nail the doors and windows shut, and don’t let her step outside!”

Two maids approached to grab me. I shook them off, turned around, and walked out of the hall.

Luoxiang suddenly ran in from outside, giving me a meaningful look. I paused, then turned back and saw her whisper something to Madam Zhou. Madam Zhou’s expression changed, and she hurried to whisper in Grandfather’s ear.

Moments later, Madam Zhou chased after me with a smile, dismissing the maids who had been dragging me away. She took my hand affectionately and said, “Yaoyao, your grandfather was just angry. Don’t take it to heart — there’s no lasting grudge between family.” She turned to the servants. “The Duke was upset — don’t overstep your boundaries. The young lady is still the young lady — you must not neglect her! Luoxiang, take her back to change and freshen up. And tell those gossiping outside to disperse!”

Luoxiang smiled and bowed. Once we were away, she whispered excitedly, “Miss, your luck has turned! Someone from the palace has come — His Majesty has summoned you! Even the Duke couldn’t touch you now!”

Inwardly, she beamed with joy: I barely lifted a finger, yet now I’ve secured a powerful connection. My own fortune is about to rise too!