Do Not Laugh! This Is a Horror Movie - Chapter 6

Nine players; now only five remained. The method to clear the game had not yet appeared.

During the day, the iron pot in the kitchen would automatically disappear, and the headless corpse of the bespectacled man would lie on the stove, covered in blood. 

However, this time his internal organs were still mostly intact, given that no one ate him last night.

Fu Lanyu went to the kitchen for a stroll, routinely grabbing a steamed bun. She bit into the bun, examining the corpse thoughtfully.

Xiaohui clung to the doorframe, peeking inside cautiously, her expression one of shock and disbelief.

“Miss Fu, can you really eat while looking at that?”

“It’s fine. I used to eat while piecing together dismembered bodies quite often. It’s pretty much standard procedure.”

Xiaohui retched again. Since meeting Fu Lanyu, she was constantly pushing her own boundaries of what she considered acceptable.

“So what exactly are you looking at?”

“The knife marks on this corpse.”

“What did you find?”

Fu Lanyu said profoundly, “They’re evenly distributed, well-arranged, with an abstract beauty.”

“…”

Fu Lanyu calmly turned around. “Miss Kiki, what do you think?”

Kiki, who had appeared behind them at some point, was startled to be suddenly called upon. After a moment of hesitation, she shook her head, her eyes red. 

“I don’t know. I… I don’t dare to look.”

“That’s understandable. New players, when they first arrive, few aren’t scared,” Fu Lanyu said naturally. 

“Xiaohui, accompany Miss Kiki for a stroll. You two can exchange experiences. It’s better than looking at this sort of foul thing.”

Xiaohui didn’t quite understand Fu Lanyu’s meaning, but she absolutely obeyed Fu Lanyu’s arrangements. She immediately walked over and linked arms with Kiki.

“Let’s go. The sun’s quite nice outside, much better than yesterday.”

“Mm…”

“Actually, this is only my second transmigration, not much different from you. Don’t put too much psychological pressure on yourself; you’ll get used to it gradually.”

Kiki agreed but couldn’t help but glance at Fu Lanyu. “Does Miss Fu really not need help?”

“We can’t help her,” Xiaohui laughed. “Her theories are beyond our comprehension.”

“…”

Fu Lanyu leaned against the doorframe. 

Only after confirming that the two figures had completely disappeared outside the brick building did she turn back and casually toss the half-eaten steamed bun into the trash can. 

She walked forward, lifted the corpse with one hand, and with the other hand took a rag, wiping clean the sticky bloodstains on the stove.

After the bloodstains were wiped clean, she saw a small white protrusion on the edge of the stove, round, as if sealed by a gelatinous substance. 

She frowned, pondering for a moment, then moved the corpse back to its original position.

Just as she was about to go to the second floor to wash her hands, she noticed Qiao Yunzheng standing at the stairwell, leaning against the railing and smiling at her.

“Found the keyhole?”

“Yes, but it seems it can’t be opened during the day.”

“Then we’ll try again tonight.”

Since there was a keyhole, there would naturally be a corresponding key. 

The way to obtain the key was to hang the white wedding dress picture frame on the bedroom wall of that house. 

They had already successfully obtained it at that time and it was currently in Fu Lanyu’s safekeeping.

Fu Lanyu said, “The key is with me. You’re really trusting.”

“You’re a smart person; you wouldn’t deliberately trick me,” Qiao Yunzheng smiled. 

“After all, this is just a low-level game; everyone’s just playing around. Once we clear it, you’ll have a formidable long-term ally. Why wouldn’t you?”

She narrowed her eyes meaningfully. “What’s your level?”

“Hm? Little girl, asking such a private question, you should tell the truth first.”

Fu Lanyu watched him in silence, as if weighing her options. Then she raised her hand and pulled out a strangely shaped pendant from her collar. 

The pendant resembled a water bottle, or more precisely, the pure jade vase held by Guanyin Bodhisattva. 

She bent two fingers and lightly flicked the pendant.

With a crisp sound, the originally dull-looking pendant suddenly lit up with a faint golden halo, its body becoming transparent, with vague water ripples visible inside. 

Although it was only for a moment, the pendant returned to normal again.

She said, “Gold Tier 3.”

“How many years did it take?”

“Seven years.”

“Remarkable.”

The [Survivor Escape System] was divided into four tiers and sixteen levels: Bronze, Silver, Gold, and Platinum. 

The lowest was Bronze Level 1, and the highest was Platinum Level 4. After clearing each level, the system would calculate rewards based on the player’s performance. 

Rewards entered the pendant in the form of water drops; this water was called “Water of Life.” When the water drops accumulated to full, the system’s binding could be lifted. 

As the level increased, the pendant’s color would change, and the quantity of Water of Life rewards would also increase accordingly. 

However, the gains became increasingly difficult.

Someone once roughly calculated that it would take at least fifteen years from the first entry into the system to the final unbinding. 

Unfortunately, there was little empirical evidence because the number of people who could last until the very end was extremely small. 

Due to the various dangers of the ghost worlds, the number of female players who could reach high levels was even rarer. 

Therefore, Qiao Yunzheng’s “remarkable” was not a casual compliment.

Fu Lanyu asked him, “What about you?”

Qiao Yunzheng also pulled out his pendant from his clothes and lightly flicked it with his finger. A faint blue light flashed and disappeared.

“Platinum Tier 1.”

“How many years did it take?”

“Same as you, seven years.”

There was always an undeniable mutual appreciation between masters. Fu Lanyu showed a hint of admiration; she knew her initial judgment was indeed correct.

“You’re truly remarkable.”

“But I’m already twenty-six years old, and you look to be only in your early twenties. Your first transmigration was probably when you were still underage,” 

Qiao Yunzheng said, like an older brother, patting her shoulder with emotion. “Such a young girl should be protected, but instead, she’s protecting others.”

“In the system world, no one goes easy on you just because you’re young,” Fu Lanyu said. “Everyone is fighting for survival; there’s no such thing as protection.”

She turned and went upstairs, and as she left, she casually wiped the bloodstains from her fingertips onto Qiao Yunzheng’s sleeve. 

Qiao Yunzheng didn’t seem to mind; he rolled up his sleeve, looked up, and watched her back as she departed. After a moment, he smiled silently.

✵✵✵

The remaining five survivors passed another calm day.

In the evening, Xiaohui sat cross-legged on the bed, watching Fu Lanyu spaced out by the windowsill, completely unfazed by the bloody human head that had once appeared there.

“Miss Fu, what are you thinking about?”

“I’m thinking that when I return to the real world, I need to change my staple food. In any case, I can’t eat steamed buns anymore.”

“…” 

Xiaohui was speechless. “Can’t you think about something important?”

“Then tell me, what constitutes something important?”

Xiaohui hesitated. 

“Now there are five of us left, but the game rule says that only three survivors will open the transmigration portal. So… what should we do about Miss Kiki and that guy?”

Fu Lanyu turned her head, her expression slightly surprised.

“You’re actually thinking about something important.”

“…”

“And, it seems you’ve automatically categorized the man surnamed Qiao into our camp?”

“Isn’t he?” Xiaohui was puzzled. 

“I see you two often exchanging knowing glances; you must have been colluding for a long time.”

“Please don’t misuse idioms. That’s called a strong alliance.”

Xiaohui gave a very wronged 

“Oh.” 

“So, when it comes down to it, are we really going to kill people?”

“Some things don’t necessarily require you to do them yourself.”

Before Fu Lanyu finished speaking, a knock came from outside the door, followed by Kiki’s soft, timid voice.

“Miss Fu, can I come in?”

Xiaohui was surprised. “Why is she here?”

Fu Lanyu tilted her chin, indicating calmly, “Since she’s already here, open the door for her.”

So Xiaohui ran to open the door and let Kiki in. 

Kiki grabbed Fu Lanyu’s hand as soon as she entered, showing that she was very clear-headed and knew which of the two held the real authority.

“Miss Fu, can I sleep in your room tonight? So many people have died; I’m really scared…”

Fu Lanyu pulled her hand back and glanced at her. “You can, but you’ll have to sleep on the floor.”

“No problem!” Kiki breathed a sigh of relief and nodded happily. “Anywhere is fine, as long as I can have company with you!”

“Alright.”

These two words were the last Fu Lanyu spoke all evening. Then she went back to meditating by the window, ignoring everyone.

Kiki whispered to Xiaohui, “Are you and Miss Fu very close? Did you transmigrate together?”

“Yes.”

“You can transmigrate together?”

“Because I’m her client. I signed a contract and paid her to guide me through the levels.”

Kiki asked curiously, “So Miss Fu is really amazing? Can I ask her to help me in the future too?”

Xiaohui thought to herself that Kiki probably wouldn’t get that chance, because the game only allowed three survivors in total. 

Now, with the two powerful players plus herself, the spots were already reserved. Would Kiki even have a future? 

But despite her thoughts, she gave an ambiguous reply.

“Of course, Miss Fu is very amazing. Just remember to bring enough money; she doesn’t like bargaining.”

“Oh…”

…

Late at night, the oil lamps in the room extinguished again. 

There was no human head on the windowsill tonight, but the ballad still started on time, repeating those few lines. 

The female ghost seemed to have placed a timed tape recorder in the brick building.

Having stayed for a few days, Xiaohui had gradually been influenced by Fu Lanyu’s calm demeanor, and her sleep quality had also improved considerably.

She was now habitually holding Fu Lanyu’s arm, breathing steadily, and had already fallen asleep. 

Fu Lanyu had also remained motionless for a long time, seemingly sleeping soundly.

The bedding for the floor was thin, and the cold from the floor seeped into the quilt in waves. Kiki stared with open eyes into the void of darkness.

After a long time, she turned around, facing the direction of the bed. 

She quietly got up from the floor and slowly pulled out a dagger from under her pillow—the very one that had killed Wang Xin earlier. 

When she entered the room earlier, this knife had been hidden in her combat boots.

She stood by the bed, silently and in the dark, confirming the positions. Xiaohui was sleeping on the inner side of the bed, and Fu Lanyu was on the outer side.

She smiled silently, then raised the dagger high, poised to stab towards Xiaohui’s position.

However…

The next second, the dagger stopped mid-air. Her wrist was tightly gripped by someone, making it impossible to drop even half an inch further.

Fu Lanyu opened her eyes.