After Constantly Courting Death, I Became the White Moonlight - Chapter 30

Pei Ji had a nightmare.

In it, he found himself once more inside the house of his childhood—the dark, narrow cellar that had defined his early years.

The basement was cramped and lightless, a place where sunlight never reached. His mother had always hated the sight of him. Whenever she was in a foul mood, she would lock him in that tiny room. Alone in that oppressive darkness, he had come to know it as the whole of his world.

—But in truth, that cellar had been a twisted kind of sanctuary. At least there, he was spared the beatings and scoldings that came without warning or reason. As long as he curled into a corner and shut his eyes, sleep would grant him a rare moment of peace.

And now, he was back again.

Darkness pressed in on all sides. The air was ice cold, biting against his skin. The shadows and chill clung to him like a vast, invisible net, silent and suffocating.

Suddenly, the trapdoor above opened.

Pei Ji looked up—and saw his mother, long since dead.

She looked just as she had at the moment of her death, though the beauty she once flaunted had long since rotted away.

Her face had turned a sickly red-brown, her pupils rolled so far back that only the bloodshot whites of her eyes remained. Her limbs twisted at unnatural angles, as if every joint had been broken and reassembled wrong. As she staggered closer, her bones clicked and snapped with every step.

“You wretched bastard! You monster!”

Her voice echoed inside his chest like the tolling of a bell on a winter night—deep, lingering, and cold. The hatred twisted across her ruined face grew sharper with every word. Her shrieking voice was like a dagger splitting his eardrums.

“Nothing good ever happens around you! You’ll drag everyone down with you! Jinx! Why don’t you just die already?!”

He gasped—then jolted awake.

His eyes flew open, his breath ragged and shallow.

Agony scorched every inch of his body. The wounds left by Xuan Ye felt as if they were still ablaze, fire gnawing at his flesh. Though Pei Ji was no stranger to pain, it still made him instinctively knit his brows.

His skull throbbed. Though the storm of demonic energy and sword aura inside him had finally calmed, the aftershocks lingered—like a swarm of tiny insects biting at his bones.

In the world of cultivation, defeating someone a level above wasn’t unheard of. But the gap between Peak Core Formation and Late Nascent Soul was no small leap—especially considering that Xuan Ye had once been a Soul Transformation expert. To defeat him meant putting one’s life on the line.

Unlike Ning Ning and the others, Pei Ji had long since grown used to skirting the edge of life and death. He didn’t fear battle. So long as he could land a killing blow, he’d stake everything—including his own life.

—Besides, his life was worthless. He had no ties, no one who cared whether he lived or died. If he truly perished, it would make no difference to the world.

His gaze dimmed a little as he lifted his eyes to take in his surroundings.

After losing consciousness in the battle with Xuan Ye, he’d clearly been brought to a medical hall for treatment.

A faint scent of herbs hung in the air like smoke. Lying flat on his back, the first thing he saw when he opened his eyes was a dark wooden ceiling beam. Then, as he turned his head slightly—

He saw someone sitting at his bedside.

Pei Ji had never imagined that when he woke, someone would actually be there.

As a child, when he collapsed from cold, hunger, or pain, no one ever stayed beside him. Later, when he lay broken after fierce battles, he always endured the recovery alone—gritting his teeth, foraging for herbs to treat himself.

But now, someone was here.

The scent of trees and medicine on that person mingled in the air, dulling the bitterness that clung to the room.

She wore a pale lavender long dress, her jet-black hair cascading obediently down her chest. With a book held up in front of her face, Pei Ji couldn’t see her expression at all.

All he could see were the bold characters on the cover of the book—

“My 365 Days with the True Xiao Sword Sovereign.”

Enduring the pain in his body, Pei Ji hesitated for a moment before speaking in a low, uncertain voice. “…Little Senior Sister?”

Ning Ning clearly hadn’t expected him to wake up so soon. Her hands flailed awkwardly, and the book, My 365 Days with the True Xiao Sword Sovereign, flipped and flopped between her fingers like some kind of juggling act. Finally, with an abrupt snap, she shut the book and tossed it onto the wooden table beside the bed.

For some reason, her face was flushed bright red, as if she’d been caught doing something embarrassing. She forced herself to look calm and met his eyes squarely.

Even Chengying, who usually shrieked at the top of its lungs whenever Ning Ning appeared, was uncharacteristically silent—quiet as a mouse.

Pei Ji frowned slightly, confused.

“You scared us half to death!”

After a brief silence, Ning Ning finally spoke, her tone stern—but the pink tinge on her cheeks and the slight tremble in her voice robbed the words of their intended force. “You actually drew demonic energy into your sword… If you’d lost control even a little, forget about fighting Xuan Ye, you wouldn’t have even survived yourself—do you realize that?!”

A cold, mocking smile flickered in Pei Ji’s eyes. He replied with a half-hearted, “Mn.”

Ning Ning had always been a carefully nurtured flower, someone who had grown up in the sun. Pei Ji had no interest in, nor the energy for, explaining himself to someone like that.

No backing, no retreat—if he didn’t bet everything he had in the moment, he’d be the one to die. It was that simple.

“That ‘mn’ was way too perfunctory.”

Ning Ning huffed in irritation, turning her gaze away stiffly. “Back in the Ancient Wood Sea, it was the same—you always charge ahead on your own and try to take everything on… but we’re here too, you know.”

Pei Ji froze.

“I know you’re used to being alone,” she said, her voice softening slightly. “But things aren’t the same now.”

It clearly wasn’t easy for her to say all this. Her expression twisted with discomfort, and in the end, she simply gave up and met his gaze head-on. “A junior disciple should act like a junior disciple, okay? Stop trying to play the hero all the time. Give us seniors a chance to step up too! Your Senior Sister isn’t some delicate little thing who can’t lift a chicken—I can protect you too!”

Her voice dropped again, soft as falling snow. “…But really, thank you. For stopping Xuan Ye for me. I owe you one. When you’re better, I’ll treat you to a big meal. Just… learn to trust us a little. Don’t always think you’re on your own.”

Pei Ji never imagined Ning Ning would say something like that.

She wasn’t scolding him for being reckless with his life. What she really resented… was that he always excluded himself from the group, always chose to walk alone.

No one had ever told him that he didn’t have to throw himself headfirst into every fight alone.

No one had ever said, I can protect you too.

He had spent so many years growing wild in the mud, used to enduring cruelty and suffering with a blank face. But hearing those words now—he felt a rare and unfamiliar twinge in his chest.

For the first time, his pale, sickly face revealed something like confusion. A haze clouded his dark eyes, pushing aside the coldness and shadow that had always lingered there.

Seeing the shift in his expression, Ning Ning gave a little humph, sounding rather pleased with herself. “Don’t think I’m being all mushy! You just stole all the spotlight, and as your Senior Sister, I need to save some face too.”

Chengying finally broke its silence.

“Did you notice? Every time Ning Ning shows she cares, she has to make up some silly excuse to distance herself from you. But her intentions are obvious. Anyone can see right through them.”

It gave a cheeky laugh. “She’s so cute, even when she’s covering her ears and pretending no one else can hear the bells. You better not call her out on it, Pei Xiaoji.”

Just as it finished speaking, a wave of thick medicinal scent swept into the room.

A woman in white entered carrying a porcelain bowl filled with herbal soup, followed closely by a scholarly young man exuding an aura of gentle refinement.

Ning Ning met their gaze and calmly introduced them. “These are Miss Xie and Physician Chen from the clinic. If not for them, you wouldn’t even be breathing right now.”

“Young master, you’ve finally awakened.”

Hearing Pei Ji murmur a quiet thank you, the female physician smiled faintly. She cast a glance at Ning Ning, who still sat beside the bed. “Ever since she brought you here, Miss Ning Ning hasn’t eaten or slept, sitting at your bedside the whole time. If you’d taken any longer to wake, I would’ve been worried for her instead.”

Ning Ning suddenly widened her eyes. “I was just… just trying to diet! Skipping meals for dieting doesn’t count as being ‘too worried to eat,’ okay?”

She paused for a moment after speaking, as if she remembered something. Then she reached into her storage pouch and fished out a few colorful, round objects. Pei Ji narrowed his eyes and saw they were candies.

“I went ashore with the senior sisters today and bought some sweets. I can’t finish them all myself anyway, so I thought I’d share some with you—especially since I heard the medicine you’re taking is super bitter.”

For some reason, both the physician lady and the physician gentleman beside her let out quiet chuckles at the same time.

Pei Ji hesitated, then gently shook his head. “I don’t mind the bitterness. I don’t need them.”

“Young master, just accept it.”

The lady doctor smiled meaningfully, covering her lips with her free hand. “It’s a rare gesture of kindness from Miss Ning Ning. If you refuse, she might be heartbroken.”

The male doctor chimed in mysteriously, “That medicine really is bitter. A bit of sugar won’t hurt.”

Ning Ning looked like she was fuming, glaring at him with puffed-up cheeks. But she didn’t say anything, her expression still feigning indifference on the surface.

Pei Ji had no choice but to nod.

At once, she shoved a candy into his palm and mumbled in a stiff voice, “Try it. See how it tastes.”

Pei Ji wasn’t used to sweets.

When he was younger, he feared pain and bitterness. But over the years, he’d grown used to both. No matter how vile the medicine, he could gulp it down in one breath while holding his breath. The bitter aftertaste would linger in his mouth, but he’d grit his teeth and bear it.

He just had to survive the worst of it.

He clumsily unwrapped the paper around the candy and revealed a small, milky-white ball. It was a comforting color—like thick mist or sweet milk—pure and untainted.

Pei Ji stole a quick glance at Ning Ning before placing it in his mouth.

A soft, milky sweetness instantly spread across his tongue, laced with a faint honey-like fragrance. The bitter tang of blood that had still lingered at the back of his throat was completely washed away by the mellow scent, leaving behind only a soothing sweetness.

His dark eyes, usually filled with a cold sharpness, were now quietly softened, as if melted by the flavor. His gaze turned calm, gentle—more like that of a normal teenager.

Ning Ning crossed her arms, keeping her tone cool and distant. “Well? How is it?”

“…Very sweet,” Pei Ji nodded. “Thank you, Senior Sister.”

It looked like she was about to smile, the corners of her lips lifting slightly—but she quickly forced it back down into a flat, thin line. “Hmph. At least you’ve got good taste.”

“Miss Ning Ning,” the lady doctor said with a teasing note in her voice, “I heard from some spirits in the city—several elders of the Xuanxu Sword Sect have arrived and are waiting for you.”

Her smile never faded, but her tone gained weight. “We’ll take good care of the young master here. You don’t need to worry.”

Ning Ning instantly frowned and huffed, “Sister, what do you mean ‘take care for me’? I’m not worried about him at all.”

She turned to leave after saying that, but not before thrusting another handful of candy into Pei Ji’s hand. “Don’t forget these! I used my private stash of money to buy them. Blood and sweat went into these, you hear me? Treat them well!”

Pei Ji could only nod obediently.

“Young master,” the physician lady said quietly once Ning Ning was gone from sight, “don’t believe everything Miss Ning Ning says.”

Her voice was laced with amusement. “With the young city lord’s recent appearance and all the elders being dragged into a public tribunal, we’ve been swamped—there’s no way we’d have time to stroll around the shore. Those candies? Miss Ning Ning went out of her way to buy them for you.”

“I heard she got lost in the city for half the day, wandered out, and then got lost again in the woods. She might act silly, but she’s not stupid. When she finally made it back to Jialan City, she was so exhausted she couldn’t even move. All the wounds that had just been bandaged reopened.”

The old physician chuckled as well. “She said our medicine smelled way too bitter, so she went out of her way to buy you all sorts of candy. Sat right in front of the clinic trying them one by one—got her teeth sore from the sour ones. The one you just ate, sweet, wasn’t it? Miss Ning Ning handpicked each and every piece herself.”

Pei Ji didn’t respond. He only let out a low “mm” and quietly accepted the porcelain bowl, lowering his head to drink the medicine.

But without warning, the tips of his ears flushed a soft, pale red—like a delicate wash of ink brushed onto fine white paper, gentle and warm against his snowy skin.

How strange.

That familiar bitterness that once made him want to gag… now slid down his throat with surprising ease.

The female doctor smiled knowingly, her eyes full of teasing. She didn’t need him to say a word—his expression said it all. Standing on tiptoe, she leaned toward the old physician and whispered, “The young master’s shy. We should stop teasing him.”

The old man nodded in agreement, his voice slow and amused. “Ah, to be young again. Youth is a wonderful thing.”

“Oh-hohoho…”

Cheng Ying could hardly hold back her laughter. She threw her voice into an exaggerated broadcaster’s tone, dramatically reciting like she was reading from a child’s essay:
“The tongue may taste the candy—but it’s the heart that feels the sweetness! Am I right, or am I right?”

She paused for effect, then burst into even louder, unrestrained laughter.

“Wait—wait, did you just smile? Secretly? Did you?! Don’t deny it! Aww, look at that! You’re blushing! Pei Ji is blushing! I can’t believe it! Oh my god!”